Top 2 Tuesday.

Woohoo! Top 2 Tuesday at The Undomestic Momma.

This week's topic is Top 2 Favorite U.S. Cities.

This is incredibly hard for me. I have been lucky enough to see a lot of the U.S. and I have a very tough time choosing my two favorites. So, I will cheat. I am going to choose my top 2 places to visit and my top 2 places to be.

1. New York City

I know it's cliche, but I absolutely love New York City. My dad is from Long Island, so I've had the opportunity to go a number of times. There is never a shortage of places to go and things to see. The Empire State Building, Broadway, Times Square, Madison Square Garden, Central Park, the list goes on and on. I don't think I could ever live there, but I would jump at every chance to go. Oh yeah - and contrary to popular belief, every New Yorker I've ever met has been incredibly kind!

2. Chicago

Clearly, I'm a city girl. To me, Chicago is the quintessential American city. It is so full of history, beautiful parks and architecture, and cool things to see. The skyline is gorgeous and honestly, so are the guys. There is nothing better than a corn-fed Midwestern boy. ;) Chicago is also home to Brian Urlacher (who was on this week's episode of Entourage! AHH!)...but, I promise - that didn't weigh too heavily on my decision.

For the record, I also love Las Vegas, St. Louis, New Orleans, and Memphis. I'm sure I would also love San Francisco and Boston, but I've never been to either one!

...and now for places I love to be...

1. Oxford, Ohio

How can I not choose it? I called it home for four wonderful years. Some of my fondest memories are set here and I can't wait to return Uptown to make some more.

2. Charlottesville, Virginia

I'm lucky enough to have a place in Charlottesville, too. Over the years, I have come to love it. I feel very comfortable there and love the bohemian, artistic lifestyle. I also enjoy its slower way of life and the beauty of the Blue Ridge Mountains. Whether it's tailgating before a UVA football game or spending the evening downtown at Miller's, I love spending time in C'Ville.

Gotta love those fear-mongers.

Maybe it's the political science major in me, but I feel compelled to talk about the "Ground Zero Mosque" issue...just like everyone else.

If you don't know what's going on, here it is in a nutshell: There is a proposal to build an Islamic center and mosque on private property located three blocks from Ground Zero. This center would include a performing arts center, a swimming pool, a lecture hall, a culinary school and restaurant, a gym, and a mosque.

I'm left wondering - what's the issue here?

Trust me. I understand the gravity of 9/11. I wasn't too young to realize the aftermath of the terrorist attacks. I was lucky enough to know no one harmed during the attack. This, of couse, doesn't mean that I wasn't deeply affected by it. So many people were lost and even more people were left to deal with the pain of losing them. I know that Muslim extremists were responsible for this atrocious act. I, like every other American, wanted them to pay. I know that Ground Zero is sacred ground: a spot to remember those lost and reflect on the tragic events of that day. Consequently, I know that people can become quite emotional when discussing 9/11 or Ground Zero.

That being said, this has nothing to do with any of that.

As we approach the nine-year anniversary of 9/11, I thought Americans would be more in tune with the difference between practicing Muslims and radical Muslim extremists. Apparently not.

First of all, why is this even being called the 'Ground Zero mosque?' It's not on Ground Zero. It is being built three blocks away from where the Twin Towers fell. Also, it is an Islamic center that includes a mosque - so, why are we simplifying the name to 'mosque?' We don't call the YMCA the LaRosa's basketball court. Why? Because it's not in LaRosa's and it's more than just a basketball court.

Also, there should be no question as to whether or not they can build this center. It is on private property. Those with the money to build it should be allowed to do so, assuming they abide by local construction laws.

America was founded on the principle of religious freedom. In fact, we learn in elementary school that the first European settlers came to America in an effort to avoid religious persecution. Years later, the founding fathers guaranteed religious freedom in the First Amendment to the Constitution:

"Congress shall make no law respecting an establishment of religion, or prohibiting the free exercise thereof..."

For hundreds of years, religious freedom has stood at the core of American beliefs and values. What better way to stay true to ourselves and affirm our strength and resilience to the rest of the world than show how tolerant we are? Why are we making an exception to our rule?

ISLAM IS A RELIGION. IT IS NOT A TERRORIST IDEOLOGY. There are Christian terrorists. There are Jewish terrorists. Terrorism is not exclusive to Muslims. This should go without saying. Unfortunately, we often have ignorant opinions force-fed to us and I think that many people forget this.

Building a mosque near Ground Zero isn't offensive or insensitive. It isn't being done maliciously as a slap in the face of the victims of 9/11. It won't look like a symbol of the terrorists' victory. It will serve as a symbol of our tolerance and our ability to forge ahead. It will demonstrate that we have preserved the ideas of our founding fathers and stand true to them today. It will show that we aren't bigots and that Muslims in our country are treated with the same respect as Christians, Jews, Buddhists, Mormons, and atheists.

There's another reason why this center should be built. Imagine being a Muslim American citizen on September 12, 2001. I really can't fathom the amount of ridicule, distrust, and scathing comments they have unjustly received. Can you imagine being on a plane? Unfortunately, our country is filled with too many closed-minded racists who can't move past the image of a turban or a burka. This center will serve as a community center for American citizens, not terrorists. We don't judge every pro-life advocate based on the actions of the few who walk into abortion clinics strapped with TNT. These American citizens have been criticized and mistreated for years, thanks to the horrendous actions of just a few extremists and our resulting Islamaphobia.

I understand how hard it is to get straight facts in this country. If you grow up with racist parents, chances are you will be racist. If you watch certain television programs, you will hear racist commentary. Contrary to popular belief, just because you see the word 'NEWS' in the corner of your television screen doesn't mean you are hearing unbiased facts.

As I've already mentioned, I have liberal leanings. I cannot stand Fox News. I would rather go to the dentist than listen to the garbage that spews from the mouths of Bill O'Reilly, Glenn Beck, or Sarah Palin. Unfortunately, so many people in this country listen to their programs with the mistaken belief that what they are hearing is unbiased news. It isn't. It is commentary...on a news channel. Biased commentary (that happens to be on the opposite side of the political spectrum than me). If their opinions align with yours, then that's fine. Listen to them. I can respect their opinions, but not when they are racist or use unfair generalizations. That is where I draw the line.

For instance, Glenn Beck recently said, "Muslims can do anything they want, just like every other American, except blow people up." Why is he insinuating that Muslims would want to blow people up? Comments like these create mistaken ideas. He isn't directly saying it, but that comment comes across to me as something close to 'Every Muslim is a terrorist."

Critics of the mosque are right about one thing. Building the center near Ground Zero won't improve Americans' perception of Muslims. Those who see Muslims with tunnel vision and lump them together with terrorists won't suddenly change their minds. Fox News commentators will continue to re-inforce the baseless, racist opinions of many Americans who don't realize the impact of their hate-filled words. Only people themselves can change their own personal perception of Muslims.

BUT, do you know what the center's construction will do? It will reassure me that the United States is truly the greatest and the strongest country in the world. It will show me that despite the fear-mongering, the racism, and the ignorance of a few, our country prevails on the tolerance and the fairness of the majority. It will prove yet again that we stand by the ideals of our founding fathers and that one horrifying act by a terrorist group hasn't altered the foundation of our wonderful country. It will make me even prouder than I already am to live in this country - a country in which a random 22-year-old girl can openly share her opinions on important issues like this.

62nd Annual Emmy Awards.

As promised, I'm here to fill you in on some football and the 62nd Annual Emmys.

The Bengals lost to the Buffalo Bills on Friday, 35-20. Yikes. Good thing the pre-season doesn't shake me. Our biggest problem seemed to be penalties, which we absolutely cannot afford. We had an embarassing amount of them (12 which totaled 122 yards). The saving grace? Our first-string offense looked better than it has in the last few games. Carson played pretty well, creating two touchdown drives in his three series. He connected with Ocho, T.O., and Gresham - who is looking better and better with each game. I'm not too upset with the loss, but we certainly need to get some things worked out before our opener against the Patriots.

In other football news, Urlacher missed his pre-season game against the Cardinals (a 14-9 loss) due to his 'strained left calf.' Luckily, they say he will be ready to go by the regular season. Tebow returned from his bruised ribs to play against the Steelers tonight. The Broncos won, 34-17. In addition to looking beautiful, Tebow went 5/10 for 72 yards. Not great, but not horrible. Although he threw his first NFL interception, he also threw his first NFL touchdown. I wonder when people will shut the hell up about his 'hideous release' and see that he is a capable passer? I know I'm biased, but sweet heavens...

And now, my thoughts on the Emmys:

• As usual, my predictions were absolutely horrendous. I correctly guessed 7 winners out of 26 total categories. I simply don't watch enough TV to know who will win. Maybe that's a good thing?

• I actually screamed in joy when Jane Lynch won Best Supporting Actress in a Comedy Series for Glee. She is the best part of the show and deserves it.

• Since I'm a huge gleek, I felt like my favorite show got the shaft. Lea Michele, Chris Colfer, and Matthew Morrison were up for awards (and lost). Even more painful, Glee didn't win Best Comedy Series. It's alright - hopefully next season is even better!

• How is Lea Michele so beautiful? I absolutely loved her Oscar de la Renta dress - my favorite one of the night. She also pulls off bangs better than I do...and I've been rockin' these bad boys since the 5th grade. ;)



• Tina Fey is just amazing. So is George Clooney, who won the Bob Hope Humanitarian Award. Apparently, he isn't just handsome, talented, and smart. He's also self-sacrificing, generous, and charitable. Some people have it all, I suppose.

• Why wasn't Entourage up for anything?

• Don't get me wrong - I love Betty White. Still, is anyone else getting tired of the granny with a healthy sexual appetite bit yet? Maybe I'm just jealous that she's scoring with Hollywood's hottest men...and I'm sitting at home, drooling.

• Looks like I need to watch Modern Family, Mad Men, and Temple Grandin.

• Jimmy Fallon did pretty well as the host. While watching his late night show, I normally feel uncomfortable and nervous for him. That's probably not a good sign. Tonight, though, he seemed a whole lot less awkward than some of the presenters. His parody songs were a great touch and reminded me of his best days on SNL.

• I really, really don't like Anna Paquin. Something about her face, voice, and general demeanor annoy me. A lot. Maybe that's why, despite my best efforts, I cannot get into True Blood.

• Am I the only person that finds Ricky Gervais extremely attractive? Please say no. I don't think it's the looks. He's just ridiculously hilarious to me.

Honey Nut Cheerios complete me.

It's that time again. Getting to know YOU Sundays at MannLand5.

1. If you accidently knick a car in a parking lot..Do you leave a note or do you get the heck out of there?

Well, I've never done this, but I'm fairly certain I would leave a note. The guilty conscience would kill me if I left.

2. Love your body or plastic surgery?

Let's be clear. I don't love my body, but I don't think I'd get plastic surgery either.

3. What about your favorite blog(s) continues to drive you back?

Humor. I also love reading rants, critiques, and any kind of celebrity post.

4. What percent of your blog is BS just to make your life seem more interesting than it really is?

Absolutely 0%. Can't you tell?

5. If you had to give up one type of meat for the rest of your life, what would it be?

Fish. I hate the taste of most fish.

6. How often do you eat out?

It used to be a whole lot more at school, but these days, about once (maybe twice) a week.

7. Skinny jeans or boot cut jeans?

Neither. I own zero pairs of jeans.

8. If you caught your spouse cheating would you forgive, divorce, or plan your kill?

Hmm...easier said than done. I've never been in that situation and hopefully never will. If so, I'm not sure. It depends on the circumstances. For example, whether you have kids or not, etc.

I'll be back later with a Bengals and Emmys update.

I love movies.

I've decided that today is the day. I will attempt to count down my top 10 favorite movies of all-time (in no particular order).

1. The Departed

I can honestly say that this is my favorite movie of all-time. Martin Scorsese is a genius, the cast is stacked, and the story is brilliant. The acting is incredible and I love every single person in it. Matt Damon, Leonardo DiCaprio, Jack Nicholson, Mark Wahlberg, Alec Baldwin, Martin Sheen. I also love gangster/mafia movies and this is the quintessential modern mob movie. It's drama, comedy, and action all in one. Plus, I love the whole Irish-Boston feel to it. It makes me want to go there. Badly.

2. American Beauty

If I could have written any screenplay, I would have wanted it to be this. Somehow, the story is both hilarious and haunting. Although I was only 12 when I first saw it, I was forever changed by it. Kevin Spacey and Annette Bening are phenomenal. In many ways, it is a parody of stereotypical suburban life. The music is perfect for it, too.

3. Forrest Gump

I think everyone loves this movie. It is responsible for Tom Hanks becoming my favorite actor. I love how it intricately weaves throughout the decades, touching on so many important events throughout American history. Elvis, Bear Bryant and Alabama football, desegregation of schools, Vietnam, John Lennon, Watergate, etc. It's so simple, yet so complex.

4. Fight Club

Do I even have to rationalize this? I love Chuck Palahniuk. Although Fight Club isn't my favorite Chuck book, it is one of my favorite movies. Edward Norton and Brad Pitt portray the character(s) perfectly and Helena Bonham Carter is creepy as always. The movie leaves me with this empty feeling (that isn't necessarily a good one), but I love movies that have that power over me. I could go on forever about this movie, but I almost forgot...The first rule of Fight Club is: You do not talk about Fight Club. That may actually be the second rule, too.

5. Moulin Rouge

Ever since I was a child, I have loved musicals. In fact, I can't think of a single musical I don't like. I could easily fill a top 10 musical list. Still, I have to be selective, so I will choose Moulin Rouge to represent all of my musical loves. It does pain me not to include A Chorus Line. The music in this movie is amazing. Ewan McGregor and Nicole Kidman are perfect together and I love the bizarre directing style of Baz Luhrman.

6. Boondock Saints

A high school favorite. Another Boston action flick. I don't know what it is with the Irish/Boston feel, but I love it. The movie has such an awesome concept and it's one of my absolute cult favorites. Not to brag, but I think I saw this movie about 3 years before it became insanely popular. Throughout high school, we probably watched it at my house every other weekend.

7. Swingers

Speaking of cult classics, Swingers is just a beautiful film. It is so simple and so true. Everyone can relate to this movie. Jon Favreau's writing is so spot-on. The whole script is based on his life and his real-life friendship with Vince Vaughn. Vince, of course, is flawless. You can see the early signs of his quick-talking, hilarious spitfire. This was the beginning of our life-long love affair.

8. Friday Night Lights

Commence cry fest. This movie perfectly embodies the intensity and passion of high school football. Although I'm not from Texas, I feel like Ohio is close in its obsession with football. It almost seems like a documentary to me...mostly because it's based on an incredible true story of Odessa, Texas. Plus, Explosions in the Sky is perfect football music.

9. 300

Aside from my intense crush on Gerard Butler, this movie is awesome. I'm a huge history buff and although the director took some creative liberties with the story, there are key parts that hold true to the real battle of Thermopylae. I'm endlessly interested in the Spartans and let's be honest - there are some badass one-liners. Finally, the cinematography is out of this world.

10. The Sandlot

Oh, come on. You knew this was coming. My childhood favorite. When asked what my favorite movie is, I always say The Sandlot in an effort to avoid controversy and get away without really answering the question. It's such a wonderful children's story with such a cute plot. Oh yeah - I also had a huge crush on Yeah Yeah.

...and there you have it.

...and this one belongs to the Reds!

Over the years, my relationship with baseball has been surprisingly solid.

Growing up, I was surrounded completely by UVA football and never really paid much attention to baseball. Despite the fact that he's from New York City, my dad was never really a baseball fan. Still, he would take us to Cinergy Field, and later Great American Ballpark, for games quite often. Consequently, I have some wonderful memories with him at games and have developed a soft-spot for the hometown team.

Although football is clearly my true sports love (and hockey has recently become my gigolo), I have always been a Reds fan and have never gone a summer without attending at least one of their games. ...and before you make fun of me, I looked it up - gigolo is the male version of a 'mistress.'

This summer, it has been particularly easy to be a Reds fan. They are on fire and this is unusual for the end of August. They are currently leading the NL Central with a four-game lead over St. Louis. Play-offs, here we come!

Tonight, I convinced my wonderful dad to take me to my 4th game of the season. Thanks to the promise of dinner, it didn't take too much arm-twisting. He scalped one ticket and got the other from a family friend. He made reservations for the Riverfront Club where we stayed until the 6th inning.

If you ever get the chance, I suggest you have dinner in the Riverfront Club. The view is unbeatable. You sit in the air conditioning, in front of an enormous window, eat, and watch the game. The view of the field and the Ohio River is beautiful. That is, of course, if there is such a thing as a beautiful view of that sketchy water.

He had salmon, soup, and salad. I took the more traditional baseball route and went with sliders and chips. The food was great and the view was better.

After we left dinner, we walked around the stadium for a bit before settling on some nosebleeds. The Reds man-handled the Cubs, beating them 7-1. Right Fielder Jay Bruce hit THREE homeruns and I got to stare at Votto. Always a plus.

After the game, we watched the awesome fireworks display. It was synchronized to music and the songs were great, too. They played some DMB, "Burning Down the House" by The Talking Heads, "Tom Sawyer" by Rush, and "Higher Ground" by The Red Hot Chili Peppers. Not bad.

Maybe some day I'll stop living this easy dream life and be a real person. Maybe. ;)

The Bengals play the Bills tomorrow. Who-dey?!

Stream of consciousness for the win!

Random assortment of thoughts:

• Today really felt like fall to me. It was finally cool enough to turn off our air conditioning and open all the windows and doors. I love that.


• I also made the surprising decision to bake today. I made 24 spice cake cupcakes with cream cheese frosting. If you know me at all, you realize that this is a big deal.




• While I was making the cupcakes, I watched a replay of the Florida game against South Carolina from last year on ESPNU. I felt so...southern...watching college football and baking with the windows open. HA! For one brief second, I even considered being a housewife. Don't worry - I quickly thought better of it. I mean, unless Tebow wanted me to stay home with the kids. Side note: If I actually married him, I think I would still call him Tebow. Is that a problem?


• Speaking of career choices, I really need to get a job. ASAP. Any suggestions, friends?


• I had to remind my parents that it was their 24th wedding anniversary today. Awesome.


• Jenn, Mrs. Koenig, and I went to the midnight showing of The Last Exorcism. I have mixed feelings on the movie. There were a few incredibly creepy parts (most of which were shown in the previews). However, the ending was...awful. I hate that about scary movies. There is always a gaping plot hole or a forced ending.
  

...and there you have it.

PS - I miss my sister.

Clearly, I'm auditioning for an after-school special.

It's getting heavy tonight:

There are few things in this life that bother me more than vices used as self-medication.

People often ask me why I don't drink. Before I was 21, many assumed I would start once I hit the magic drinking age. Although I am usually a law-abiding citizen, this certainly was not the reason I chose to avoid alcohol in high school and the first years of college. In fact, I always found it moronic that on November 30, 2008, I wasn't old enough to drink, but the very next day I could. I know everyone is different, but my maturity level plateaued in the 8th grade.

My reasons were (and still are) the following:

• I hate being vulnerable and not having complete control over my actions, words, ability to keep myself from drooling, etc.
• I don't need alcohol to open up, relax, or have fun.
• I cannot imagine forgetting something that happened the night before.
• I have seen plenty of drunk idiots...and even worse, I've seen smart people make stupid decisions while drunk.
• Along those same lines, I've seen what alcohol can do to relationships and how it affects a family.
• I don't ever want to sound stupid.
• I don't have the money to spend on alcohol.
• With the exception of a few girly drinks, I don't like the taste. Plus, I still prefer Dr. Pepper over the few I do like.
• I don't like the feeling 'a buzz' gives you...and I've never had more than that.
• I'm ridiculous enough as it is. I can't imagine a drunk me.

Although this isn't a reason necessarily, it is also a nice perk to know that I will always be straight enough to care for my friends and make sure they get home safely.

So, my 21st birthday came and went...and I stayed alcohol-free. Although I've had some things to drink, I've never smoked anything. Not a cigarette, cigar, pot, etc.

If you know me at all, this isn't for lack of company or availability. I am constantly surrounded by drinkers and cigarette and pot smokers. I have genuinely never had any interest in it. Ever.

Don't get me wrong. I'm not against any of it. I've seen my friends have some of the best nights of their lives while drinking, smoking, or both. I am strongly opposed to the government trying to tell me what I can and can't do. For this reason, I'm pro-choice, I'm an advocate of same-sex marriage, and I think marijuana should be legalized. (It helps, of course, that I have no religious complications with these issues either)

Still, I have made the choice (and will probably continue) to live my life alcohol- and drug-free.

That being said, I don't think alcohol, cigarettes, drugs, or food should be used as a crutch. They shouldn't be used as a form of self-medication.

It seems all too easy for me to say that. I'm not in the habit of using these things, nor am I dependent on them. I understand that addiction is a real thing and it's easier said than done to quit them. Still, it makes me incredibly sad when people I know and love turn to these things to deal with their problems.

I have watched friends and family drink away problems every night after work. I have watched them go outside for a smoke to relax. I have watched them attempt to numb themselves enough to forget reality...or, at the very least, lessen the pain of dealing with it. I've watched friends ignore problems until they are drunk enough to bring them up. In many of these cases, these coping mechanisms become such an integral part of their life and their daily routine that they start to define that person as a whole.

I know for a fact that a person is strong enough to deal with their problems without these things. I have plenty of issues, fears, obligations, etc. and I never cope by abusing these substances. I don't need to self-medicate every night in order to feel better about myself and my situation. There are healthier ways to deal with things.

I don't care how cheesy this sounds. It's true.

The only thing you need to appropriately deal with your issues (besides some courage) is love and support. It doesn't matter where you find this love. For many, it comes from their relationship with God and the strength that their faith provides them. For others, it comes from family and friends. In some cases, it comes from complete strangers - therapists, counselors on a suicide hotline, fellow addicts at an AA meeting. Everyone has someone who cares.

It took me awhile to learn this. I used to bottle up my emotions and wallow in my sadness. While in public, I would pretend everything was okay. This came back to haunt me once I was alone (or, unfortunately for her, with Jenn). I would physically hurt myself. I would break down, scream, pull my hair out, cry, and, occasionally, cut myself. Anything to release the pain. For awhile, it felt like it worked. I was horribly wrong.

Weeks later, I would still be dealing with the same problems, the same frustrations, the same insecurities, and a few new scars. That coping mechanism didn't help me cope at all - it just served as a breaking point after I bottled my emotions up for weeks at a time. Slowly, I came to learn that the only way to deal with my issues was to face them myself and talk to people...people who care about me.

I am luckier than most because my love and support comes from a multitude of places. For me, it comes from my wonderful parents who I know would love me no matter what. It also comes from Jamie and L.P. who would support any choice I make. It comes from Jenn, the best friend anyone could ever ask for, who sacrifices sleep, work outs, or relaxation time daily to listen and support me. It comes from a Facebook thread with Morgan and Sib. It comes from mass texts to Derailed. Since I'm better at writing than speaking, it comes from writing in this journal.

There are healthy ways to deal with unfair situations, stress, anger, and sadness. You don't have to turn yourself over to addiction. You don't need to depend on alcohol, drugs, or nicotine to relieve yourself. If you choose to use these substances for recreational purposes (even if that is every single day), that's your choice...and I completely respect that. It just pains me to see people turn to these things as a last resort or as a coping mechanism.

So, here I will make a vow. If you are reading this and need someone to listen, I am here. I can't promise ground-breaking advice, but I can promise attention, an open mind, and support. I may not be able to relate at all, but I am a good listener...and a pretty good hugger, too. Sometimes, that's all you need. I know because I've been there.

Told you. Shit got real.

Hallelujah.

In a previous blog post, I stated that I would upload a picture of Tim Tebow in boxer-briefs the instant I saw it. This, of course, was in reference to his signing as a spokesman for Jockey. Since then, I have come to terms with the fact that his image will probably only allow him to model t-shirts.

That being said, I saw a youtube video today where Timmy T. was wearing nothing but boxer-briefs. Now, I'm not one to break promises. True to form, I print-screened that bad boy to share with all of you. Lucky readers. ;)

Come on. I was obligated.

Grammar police SAY WHAT?!

I know how this post sounds - snobby, pretentious, and trivial. You're probably right.

However, it is my blog and I have some pet peeves to address. So, read on and perhaps be enlightened.

Some of you already know that I'm a stickler for grammar. I probably should be an editor. Today, I heard someone (who will remain nameless) say the following sentence: "I could of cared less." I have two issues with this.

1. The phrase itself. Saying that you could care less implies that you do care to an extent (or that there is a scenario in which you could care less about that issue). However, when people use this phrase, they are trying to express how little they care about something. Saying they could care less shows that they do care...and has the opposite effect.

The proper phrase? "I could not care less." This implies that you care so little about the issue that you can't be any more disinterested in it.

For example, "I could not care less about Brett Favre's diva-like behavior."

2. The use of 'of' rather than 'have.' You say that you could have done something, not could of. Could have, should have, would have. In this tense, those two words are inseparable. That's it. No exceptions. The only time you can put the words 'could' and 'of' next to each other is when they are part of different grammatical elements.

For example, 'Brittany tried to steal all she could of Tim Tebow's decency." In this sentence, I am doing everything I can to corrupt Tim Tebow and penetrate his moral fortress. The sentence could be complete after the word 'could,' but I use the word 'of' to show what I'm stealing. See the difference?

I understand why people confuse 'could have' and 'could of.' When you use the contraction 'could've,' it sounds an awful lot like 'could of.' BUT - it's not.

So, in sum, I'm a psycho...and I now realize that most of you could not have cared less about this entry. ;)

Top 2 Tuesday.

Woohoo! It's Top 2 Tuesday with The Undomestic Momma.

This week's topic?

Top 2 Biggest Indulgences

1. Concerts/Events

Every year, I can't resist the urge to see my favorite bands. This year alone, I've seen Dave Matthews Band, Michael Buble, John Mayer and Phish. I also went to the Hullabalou Music Festival. I already have tickets to see Daniel Tosh do stand-up in November and I can't wait!

2. Ice Cream

I eat ice cream too often. Way too often. While in Oxford, I would get it every other day. Now that I'm in Lebanon, it is once or twice a week. I can't wait until next month when UDF gets the pumpkin pie ice cream back. My consumption might go back to every other day at that point.

Just keep swimming, swimming, swimming.

If you know me at all, then you definitely know about my love thing for Michael Phelps (who I have affectionately nicknamed Phelpsy-Poo). Tonight, I was finally able to watch the Pan-Pacs and I came to a few conclusions. If you like swimming, here they are:

• Phelps is out of shape. *Side note: If his body is 'out of shape,' I'm at a loss for words.* This also sounds absolutely absurd because he won five events. He took gold in the 100 and 200 fly and participated in three gold-winning relays. Still, my boy is struggling. He admitted that he hasn't been training hard (or often) enough. He didn't seem happy with either of his individual event times and he even dropped out of the 200 IM. Yikes.

• Why hasn't he been training? Maybe he's been spending too much time with his girlfriend. That's right, America. His girlfriend. Nicole Johnson, Miss California 2010. Let me elicit a big old Snooki "WAHHHH!!!" It was painful to watch the Pan-Pacs because they showed her as often as they show Debbie Phelps, his famously-shocked mom, during the Olympics. Barf. At least he got the last name right. I need to tell him my name is Brittany, not Nicole.

• At any rate, if anyone is providing Phelpsy with the motivation he needs to pick up the training, it's Ryan Lochte. The man is a monster. He certainly looked like the most dominant male swimmer of the summer and has the times to prove it. If anyone is going to give Phelps a run for his money, it's his close buddy with the pothead-like demeanor and surfer-boy attitude. I'm not complaining. A little friendly competition is going to do wonders for the sport. Lochte's tired of losing to Phelps and Phelps isn't happy with his new-found losses to Ryan. Maybe it's the shoes...



• ALERT! You heard it here first. Swimmer to watch for London 2012 (besides the obvious Lochte)? Nathan Adrian. The dominant American sprinter and my newest swimming crush. Don't worry - Phelpsy is my #1, but if he's with Nicole, I need someone to tide me over for a bit. That burden has fallen squarely on the shoulders of 21-year-old Nathan Adrian, a student at the University of California (where he has held a 4.0 GPA for the last two years). Sex. He even made an appearance on Mythbusters last year. I might be the only girl in the world that finds that attractive, but at least he got someone interested. It also helps that he dwarfs Phelps when standing near him. The guy is 6'6" and 220 lbs...and as you know, Mama likes big boys. (God, I'm a creep)

It's clear that I miss swimming. I can't wait for Worlds next summer or the London Olympics. I wish it were more of a mainstream sport. I could watch it for hours. Oh wait - I already do.

Almost forgot!

It's Sunday(ish)! Time for Getting to Know YOU Sunday at MannLand5.

1. If you could host a Reality TV show, which one would it be?

I don't know if these are considered reality shows, but I would definitely choose any of the traveling shows. You know - the ones hosted by Dhani Jones, Anthony Bourdain, Adam Richman, etc. I would kill to be paid to take amazing (and free) vacations.

2. Do you put your seatbelt on before or after you start the car?

Always after. I put it on while driving down the driveway. Bad habit?

3. Shave or hair removal cream?

Shave. Call me old school. Plus, the smell of that removal cream is about as sexy as the hairiest legs imaginable.

4. What's your favorite feature in a house?

This is tough. Although these aren't in a house, I love big, beautiful backyards. This is probably because I was spoiled with the best one ever as a child. I can't tell you how many hours I spent with my siblings exploring the creek and creating absurd wildlife scenarios back there.

5. What is your favorite "Fall" scent?

Football player sweat. Just kidding (kinda). Pumpkin everything - bread, candles, muffins.

6. What tv show are you looking forward to seeing the most this Fall?

Glee, no doubt. Of course, I'm also looking forward to the return of new episodes of Jeopardy. Although I never remember the answers, re-runs bother me.

7. Personal Shopper or Personal Chef?

Chef. Hands down. I may already have one...thanks, Dad.

8. What is the first word that comes to mind when you think of "Fall"?

FOOTBALL. Lebanon, Bengals, Ohio State, Packers, UVA...even Miami. Also - Halloween, leaves, hoodies, chilly, pumpkins, corn mazes, haunted trails, apples.

BIG BLUE ARCH!

I always seem to find myself awake at 2:30 AM on Monday. Weird.

This weekend was a good time.

Friday, Jenn and I went to Putter's for Sandra's birthday party. It was nice to meet some new people, speak a little Spanish, and spend time with Sandra. She's wonderful.

Saturday, Jenn, TJ, Clint, and I went to Indianapolis to visit my long-lost Howie. Now that he has become a real person (with a real job and real place), visits have been fewer and farther between. So, we made the trip to see his new apartment. It was awesome, by the way. I'm very happy for him and the way his life is going.

It's always great to spend time with some of my best friends. We got dinner, spent time in Nick's apartment, and went downtown to a bar called Kilroy's for a few drinks. Moment of truth - I always question whether I should use phrases like 'get a few drinks' because, for me, that means Coke.

Funny story of the trip: I got kicked out of a liquor store because I couldn't find my license. I know it's their job and I know many people would lie about their age. I just found it pretty funny that I, of all people, got kicked out of a liquor store. I wanted to explain that I don't drink, but figured it would be an exercise in futility. That's what I get for sporting a 3rd-grader haircut. Damn these bangs.

In other (not so) important news, I missed the Bengals game on Friday. Of course, it was blacked out in our area. Apparently, we are incapable of supporting our decent professional sports teams. Still, we beat the Eagles, 22-9. Wahoo!

Update about my league-wide lovers: Tebow didn't play against the Lions (due to his rib injury). Even worse? Brian Urlacher, the football love of my life, missed the majority of his game against the Oakland Raiders due to a left calf injury. While in Kilroy's, I saw this on the TV screen and my heart dropped. I instantly began to re-live the horrible news from last year: fractured wrist in the season opener and OUT FOR THE SEASON. No worries. Lovie Smith informed me that it doesn't seem to be very serious and I'm currently giving him 'calf massages.'

I promise I'll stop with the photoshopped pictures. This is an old one and I'll use any excuse I can to re-post it.

Unfortunately, I wasn't aware that the Pan-Pac swimming competition was this weekend. Luckily, I'm creepy enough to have programmed my TV to record anything dealing with this name: "Michael Phelps." Thank you, modern technology. I'll let you know how he did when I watch it all...since I know you're anxiously awaiting the results.

My sister starts class tomorrow. It has finally hit me that I'm no longer a Miami student. Tomorrow, I won't slowly amble to class for syllabus day. I won't procrastinate by spending homework time on Facebook instead. I won't be going to karaoke night at Brick. FML? I think so.

The Power of Christ Compels You!

A collection of random thoughts:

• I was disappointed with The Other Guys. I've reached the point where Will Ferrell seems to portray the same character in every movie. Same voice, same mannerisms. Mark Wahlberg was worse...and this is coming from a life-long lover of Marky Mark. Comedy isn't his strong suit. There were a few hilarious moments, but overall, not great. The best part? Staring at The Rock. It doesn't even matter how cheesy he is. He could sound like the teachers on Charlie Brown and I'd be totally okay with listening.
  
  
• Am I the only person that absolutely hates to shower? Don't get me wrong - I do it every single day. Still, I dread the process. I hate being wet and punching and kicking my way into clothes. Yes, I use a towel. I still hate it.
  
  
• I think I've officially reached townie status in Lebanon. I've found myself hiding at home lately. It was okay to go to Bdubbs during winter and summer breaks in college. Now that I've graduated and I still don't have a job, I'm starting to question myself. Hey - at least the college grads have one-up on the rest of the crowd during trivia Thursday nights. Ouch.
  
  
• My sister moves out tomorrow. It's going to be so boring, watching trashy VH1 reality shows without her at 3:00 AM.
  
  
• The Reds swept the Diamondbacks. They are now 3-½ games ahead of the Cardinals. Feels good, sports fans.
  
  
• Speaking of sports, did I mention it's football season? Right. The Bengals play the Eagles tomorrow at home and I'm contemplating going to the game alone. You call it insanity. I call it dedication. I'm still hitting myself for missing Tebow on Sunday.
  
  
• ...and speaking of Tebow (yes, again - get used to the celebrity talk. I tried to warn you), he bruised his ribs on Sunday and may not play on Saturday. Maybe he needs someone to nurse him back to health. I think I know someone who would do it, free of charge.
  

...but after further contemplation, I've decided that in the (maybe not so) off-chance (with my stalker-like tendencies) that we actually met each other, I don't think he'd like me much. In fact, he'd probably think I was bad. That's right. Miss-I-Never-Drink-Smoke-Or-Cause-Trouble might be too bad.

As I've already mentioned, Tebow is, for lack of a better word, a saint. He's saving himself for marriage, sports Bible verses on his eye black, and has logged more community service hours than I have sleeping hours (HUGE FEAT!). He was home-schooled until college, cries when he loses a game, talks to children and prisoners about the Gospel, and over-uses words like "special" and "exciting." In short, he is the embodiment of pristine innocence. The things I want to do to him make me feel like Satan. If he could read my mind when I thought about him, he would probably sprinkle holy water on my face...and trust me. That's not my first choice of what I'd like for him to sprinkle on my face.

Case in point. I'm such a lady.

Brittany, pump. the. brakes.

Just call me Pat.

Today, I had an interesting thought. Is it possible to be both girly and tomboy-ish at the same time? Because, I think I'm doing it.

This topic came to mind after my sister came home from the mall, bearing gifts. She bought me an adorable grey wristlet from Express - I've been needing one for quite some time. I filled it with some money, my cell phone, and my license. Then, I began to wonder what else is in everyone else's purse/wristlet.

I usually have my wallet, my camera, and a Euchre deck. That's it. No make-up. I don't wear any. Ever. No jewelry. I hate it. I don't even have my ears pierced.

Then, I started to wonder what it looks like to see a girl in a UVA football t-shirt, cargo pants, and Old Navy flip-flops carrying around a cute wristlet from Express. Somehow, still, I think that image sums up my personality.

I'm not girly, by any means. Still, I enjoy some girly things. Let me explain.

Sure, I like The Notebook, but nowhere near as much as The Departed or Boondock Saints. I've never had a manicure or a pedicure. I would take a free pair of Converse All-Stars over a free pair of Jimmy Choo heels any day. I don't really like to shop - I find it too depressing. I've never had my hair professionally styled/cut. I own zero pairs of jeans, zero skirts, zero shorts, three dresses, and zero pairs of heels. Although I'd like to, I can't cook at all. Instead of Nicholas Sparks, I read Chuck Palahniuk. I couldn't piece together a 'fashionable' outfit if I had unlimited funds and time. I really can't handle Miley Cyrus, Taylor Swift, Justin Bieber, the Jonas Brothers, etc. On a regular basis, I spend much more time watching Sportscenter or a game than showering/taking a bath, pampering, and getting ready for the day combined. I don't even dry my hair. I probably know more about football than most guys. I can't even like girly drinks because I don't like alcohol.

Still, I have some very girly tendencies. Although I never wear it, I quite like the color pink. I refuse to buy a bra anywhere other than Victoria's Secret (sorry, Gretchen Wilson - they're just better). I could easily buy out Bath and Body Works. I love perfume and OPI nail polish. In fact, I'm pretty anal about my fingernails. I absolutely love musicals, babies, flowers, gymnastics, and figure skating (not that a guy can't). I have incredibly teeny-bopper-like celeb crushes, obviously...even if they are on 'unattractive' guys. I love romantic comedies, the Twilight series, Madonna, Lady Gaga, and some B. Spears. When started at the beginning, I can become addicted to girly shows like Grey's Anatomy or One Tree Hill. I like to dress up, but I don't think I look very good doing it. So, I don't. Some days, all I want to do is sit and eat ice cream. There is absolutely nothing better to me than dinner and a movie with my best girl friends, mom, or sister. And, most importantly, I have the most insatiable desire to find love. A storybook-like romance that makes this long wait worthwhile.

So, there you have it. Is this normal or should I be cast as SNL's next gender-neutral sketch character?

Instead of laundry...

I know it's a little early for a blog update (meaning it's not 3:00 AM yet), but I just got some exciting news!

Cara, my wonderful house(basement)mate from Central Perk, has asked me to be a bridesmaid in her wedding! I am so unbelievably excited and happy for her! I have never been in a wedding before and I love Cara and Jake! Her wedding isn't until next August, but I cannot wait. This will provide me with even more motivation for Operation Muffin Top(ple).

For lack of other things to say, I will show you something else I'm going to start on my blog: Getting to know YOU Sundays from MannLand5. I know I'm a little late - seeing as how it's Wednesday, but I really like these questions.

1. What kind of athlete has the hottest body?

I suppose if you don't know my answer to this already, we don't know each other very well. Although I'm incredibly attracted to Mr. Michael Phelps and his rockin' bod, I'm definitely going with football players - particularly linebackers and some linemen. They are tall, muscular, and have ample meat on them. Thoughout the years, I have affectionately called them 'thicky thicks' because let's be honest - it's gonna take a pretty big guy to sweep me off my feet.

2. Are you a planner or a procrastinator?

Procrastinator. No question about it. In fact, I've been putting off laundry for two weeks now. What can I say? I work better under pressure. Always have.

3. Diet or regular (soda)?

This is one of my biggest flaws. I drink regular soda like I get paid to do it. I probably have five Dr. Peppers a day and I'm not exaggerating.

4. What's your one "must have" for Fall?

Once again - no question. HOODIES! There is nothing better than sitting at a football game in a hoodie.

5. What's your favorite fast food restaurant?

I question whether or not Chipotle counts. If not, Gold Star Chili. Hometown girl.

6. What do you think is the sexiest profession for a guy?

Professional athlete - more specifically, football or hockey player. If I have to choose something more realistic, I will go with lawyer. Intelligent, motivated, mature (I hesitate to say rich). Maybe that was a partial motivation to attend law school.

7. Did you wear braces?

No, but I really should have. My teeth are crooked and my overbite is somewhat reminiscent of this guy:

8. Would you rather have a guy that's super sexy or kind?

Kind, without a doubt. That's what sticks around the longest.

Top 2 Tuesday

I love reading other people's blogs. It's an addiction. Emma at Legally Lovely referred me to The Undomestic Momma and I thought it would be fun to do her 'Top 2 Tuesday.'

This week's topic is the Top 2 Characters You Would Want to Play on a TV Show or Movie.

1. Rachel Berry - Glee

The resident diva on one of my favorite TV shows. Not only does she have an amazing, Broadway-style voice, but she's gorgeous, too! She knows what she wants, doesn't take no for an answer, and she's a perfectionist. She's a bit dramatic (like yours truly) and I would kill for her wardrobe (school-girl plaid, sweater vests, and horizontal stripes galore). Oh yeah - and she gets FINN.

2. Liz Lemon - 30 Rock

I wish more than anything that I could be Tina Fey, but I suppose I would settle for being Liz Lemon, too. She is hilarious, intelligent, and makes being geeky cool. She, like Fey, writes for a sketch comedy show and embodies what I would love to be.

Philosophy at 3:00 AM

Today, I received this e-mail from Virginia Law Admissions:

Ms. Johnson,

Thank you for your patience during our wait list process. Our class has now enrolled completely full and thus we are unable to offer you a place in the entering class.

We have received approximately 7,900 nonresident applications and 675 resident applications for the 350 seats in the entering class. This was the most difficult year on record in which to gain admission to Virginia Law.

I hope you excuse the informality of this communication, but I thought you would appreciate speed over formality at this point in the season. In addition, we are communicating almost exclusively via email now in an attempt to reduce our reliance on paper.

I sincerely appreciate your interest in Virginia Law and wish you the very best of success in your legal education and professional career.

Sincerely,

Jason Wu Trujillo '01
Senior Assistant Dean for Admissions

I must admit that I saw this coming from a mile away. Months ago, they told me that they have made offers to students the day before classes start (today). They also told me that, throughout the summer, they would be widdling down the wait list. I lasted until today.

I know that this is something to be proud of. I know I should feel proud that I made it on the wait list, let alone that I stayed on it until the last possible day. Annually, UVA is ranked in the top 10 best law schools in the country (I'm talking Harvard status here). I should feel honored to have been considered.

Still, I can't help but feel disappointed in myself. I don't handle failure well. Why? Because I really don't let myself fail. I can think of only two other 'failures' in my academic life - I got a C in calculus 3rd quarter of senior year and I wasn't satisfied with my LSAT score. Other than that, I've always been content with everything I've done.

I'm not even upset about not going to UVA. In fact, I had already made up my mind that if I got a call in the last two weeks of the summer, I would decline. I don't think I'm quite ready for law school. It's so much work and I'm not committed enough make it out alive, let alone actually succeed. So, maybe this is a blessing in disguise. I don't necessarily believe in everything happens for a reason, but I do believe that positives can be found in everything.

At any rate, I'm having a tough time accepting rejection. I start to consider all of the 'what ifs.' What if I had turned my application in before the week it was due? What if I had done more community service? What if I had done even more LSAT practice or taken it twice? What if I had more work experience listed on my resume? No one is perfect and I certainly know I'm not. Still, I have extremely high expectations of myself and I work very hard to meet them. I'm the girl who puts her B's in the front of her folder to remind herself to work harder next time. Although I procrastinate, I pull all-nighters to perfect a paper or study a little longer. My determination and will to succeed is almost scary. That's me. I'm not the girl who gets denied acceptance - not even to a tier one law school.

But, maybe I am. Maybe this is the start of a new me. A me who isn't consumed by academics, constantly worried about others' opinions, and drowning in unrealistic expectations. Don't get me wrong - I will always push myself to succeed. I set high goals for myself because I know I'm capable of being great. I refuse to be anything less.

...but, maybe it's time to challenge myself in other ways. Maybe it's time to take a step away from academics for the first time and improve the other facets of my life. God knows I need help in plenty of other departments. Maybe I've been afraid to work on something else because I've gotten so comfortable as a student. I've become the perfect student. Maybe it's time to strive for perfection somewhere else.

So, friends, here's to turning bad news into something good and more importantly, here's to making me a better person - not just a better student.

Uhh...Te-BONE Me?

As I'm sure you've noticed, my Tim Tebow crush (understatement of the century) is back with a smoking vengeance. Throughout his college career, commentators drooled over him more than I did and they did a wonderful job of depicting him as a flawless, sexy saint. So, I've set out to convince myself that he isn't perfect.

At least he doesn't spend time playing with young children.


Shit. Well, at least he doesn't spend his free time helping others.

Damn. Here's one...at least he doesn't wear glasses.

What the hell? At least he doesn't have facial hair.


Uhhh...I'm really struggling here. At least he isn't passionate.

Is this a cruel joke? At least his body sucks.


Time to cry myself to sleep.