I have been blogging since 2004.
Of course, as a sophomore in high school, "blogging" means writing a play-by-play of your day, making not-so-subtle comments about your recent interactions with the guy you like, and generally boring anyone who reads your blog that isn't your BFF or mother.
I've since realized that no one wants to read what movies I watch on my couch (unless I'm writing a captivating review) or what I had for dinner (unless I'm posting the recipe). Side note: I hope that people still want to read about the guys I like, considering that makes up roughly 90% of my blog material. They're all celebrities, so there are very few awkward interactions or hurt feelings involved. I promise.
So, with my revised definition of "blogging" in mind, the new blogger Brittany faces a number of problems when sitting down at her computer.
Here is a quick idea of the battles that are waged within my mind whenever I open up Blogger:
- Does anyone care? The answer to this question is often a resounding no. Whenever I blog about my weekend, I fear that those who weren't involved in my weekend activities don't care enough to read about it. Whenever I blog about sports, I assume that those who don't care about my favorite teams or athletes skip that post. Whenever I blog about attractive male celebrities, I can almost guarantee that most guys don't read it. I think, anyway...
- Is this too personal? As you can tell, my identity is not a secret on this blog. I provide readers with my name, my e-mail address, my hometown, and the names of my family members and close friends. I upload countless pictures, and even videos, of myself. I detail my deepest fears, regrets, desires, and personal stories. Sometimes, I find myself wondering, "Will this come back to bite me?"
- Is this a job? I really wish it was. Getting paid for this would be my ultimate fantasy. However, sometimes I feel obligated to write new posts. I try to force an entry when I'm really not in the mood to write one. I feel guilty when I neglect my blog for a week. My blog has become a less-intense version of caring for an elderly parent: I love it dearly, but sometimes I need a break.
- WTF? Sometimes, when I finish a post, I re-read it to myself and think, "Uhh...I'm a freak." Don't worry - I rarely delete those posts. I tend to embrace my inner weirdo.
- Why am I writing this? Of course, I started blogging for myself. It's extremely cathartic, it forces me to really think about things, and it's a great way to remember details that I know I'd soon forget otherwise. However, I've noticed that I often pander to my readers (but no - I will never Man Meat Justin Bieber, Justin Timberlake, or Bradley Cooper). I ask my readers to participate regularly. I post the link to my blog shamelessly on my Facebook and Twitter accounts. I, like everyone else, love attention. It makes my day when I read a new comment on my blog. I often wonder how to attract new followers and spend a lot of time thinking of blog topics that will be entertaining or controversial. This has clearly become more than just a personal keepsake over the years.
In the end, I remind myself of one thing: This blog is mine. It helps me vent, allows me to chronicle my life and thoughts, and it has introduced me to a number of awesome girls/fellow bloggers around the country. People may not want to read about my penalty box fantasies with Sidney Crosby or how much I'd pay to be Tim Tebow's Under Armour for one day, but you know what? Not everyone will like what I have to say. That's the beauty of the Internet. There is a tiny X in the upper, right-hand corner of everyone's screen.
This is my safe place. This is my security blanket. This is what I will show my kids to make them feel unbelievably awkward. ("Yes, sweetheart. You were conceived on the 50-yard line of Soldier Field.") I don't need a million followers or comments to give my blog a sense of worth. I am perfectly happy with it just the way it is.
...Man Meat creepiness and all.
Wednesday, August 31, 2011
Monday, August 29, 2011
Man Meat Monday #28
I always listen to the radio while I take a shower. Lately, I’ve been hearing a lot of great new stuff from this week’s Man Meat honoree…
Claim to Fame: Rapper and Actor (Degrassi)
Birthday: October 24, 1986
Like most other American and Canadian girls my age, I first noticed Drake (Aubrey Drake Graham) on Degrassi, a popular teen drama that enticed every teenage girl who wanted a relatable soap opera to watch. Although I admit to being a huge Spinner fan, I also noticed Jimmy, Degrassi High’s attractive basketball star-turned-invalid after being shot in the back during Season 4. So, for the rest of Drake’s Degrassi career, he rolled around in a wheelchair and focused on his artistic abilities. Very Artie, pre-Glee.
Fast-forward a few years. My best friend is one of the biggest Lil’ Wayne fans on the planet. Somehow, she talked me into paying a mind-boggling amount of money for floor seats at his Cincinnati concert. About halfway through the show, Lil’ Wayne brings someone named Drake out to do a guest spot. You can imagine the look on my face when I realized Drake was none other than Jimmy from Degrassi.
As you know, Drake is one of the most popular hip-hop artists around. Between him, Lil’ Wayne, and Nicki Minaj, you won’t hear a rap song on the radio that hasn’t received the Young Money treatment. Although I like Lil’ Wayne and Nicki, I absolutely love Drake. His voice, singing and rapping, is captivating and sexy. His verses are the perfect mix of lyrical finesse, untouchable swagger, and confidence that he’d have no problem backing up (ex. “Buzz so big, I could probably sell a blank disc?” Yeah, I’d buy it.).
Oh yeah – he looks like that and he’s from Toronto. Further proof that great things come from Canada.
Random Tidbit: He is a huge momma’s boy. He even postponed his European tour last year, so that he would be at home to care for her after her surgery.
Only downfall?: That really lame Sprite commercial. I refuse to post it here.
Here, he wears horizontal stripes, talks about his Bar Mitzvah, and mentions the Backstreet Boys. *sigh*
So, readers: It’s your turn. Would you take a special ride on Drake’s wheelchair?
Because I'm convinced, even in a wheelchair, he'd be the BEST I ever had. So, I'm definitely on one.
Drake
Claim to Fame: Rapper and Actor (Degrassi)
Birthday: October 24, 1986
Like most other American and Canadian girls my age, I first noticed Drake (Aubrey Drake Graham) on Degrassi, a popular teen drama that enticed every teenage girl who wanted a relatable soap opera to watch. Although I admit to being a huge Spinner fan, I also noticed Jimmy, Degrassi High’s attractive basketball star-turned-invalid after being shot in the back during Season 4. So, for the rest of Drake’s Degrassi career, he rolled around in a wheelchair and focused on his artistic abilities. Very Artie, pre-Glee.
Fast-forward a few years. My best friend is one of the biggest Lil’ Wayne fans on the planet. Somehow, she talked me into paying a mind-boggling amount of money for floor seats at his Cincinnati concert. About halfway through the show, Lil’ Wayne brings someone named Drake out to do a guest spot. You can imagine the look on my face when I realized Drake was none other than Jimmy from Degrassi.
As you know, Drake is one of the most popular hip-hop artists around. Between him, Lil’ Wayne, and Nicki Minaj, you won’t hear a rap song on the radio that hasn’t received the Young Money treatment. Although I like Lil’ Wayne and Nicki, I absolutely love Drake. His voice, singing and rapping, is captivating and sexy. His verses are the perfect mix of lyrical finesse, untouchable swagger, and confidence that he’d have no problem backing up (ex. “Buzz so big, I could probably sell a blank disc?” Yeah, I’d buy it.).
Oh yeah – he looks like that and he’s from Toronto. Further proof that great things come from Canada.
Random Tidbit: He is a huge momma’s boy. He even postponed his European tour last year, so that he would be at home to care for her after her surgery.
Only downfall?: That really lame Sprite commercial. I refuse to post it here.
Here, he wears horizontal stripes, talks about his Bar Mitzvah, and mentions the Backstreet Boys. *sigh*
So, readers: It’s your turn. Would you take a special ride on Drake’s wheelchair?
Because I'm convinced, even in a wheelchair, he'd be the BEST I ever had. So, I'm definitely on one.
Thursday, August 25, 2011
Wedding Weekend!
Last weekend, Jenn and I drove to Minnesota for our college housemate Cara's beautiful wedding. We hadn't seen her or Jake in over a year, so it was wonderful to spend some time with them, especially on their big day!
Thursday, we had the rehearsal and rehearsal dinner at a restaurant called Jake's (too cute). We spent the rest of the night, catching up with each other and getting to know the rest of the wedding party.
Friday, we (Jenn, Kim, Laura, and I) threw Cara a surprise bachelorette party. We decorated a park shelter with balloons and streamers, picked up Subway for lunch, and decorated matching t-shirts. It was so nice to spend time outside, relaxing before the wedding chaos began.
At the end, we wrote messages on the balloons and, despite my child-like whining, let them go.
Saturday, we got to the salon early to have our hair done. We brought breakfast with us and had bagels, fruit, muffins, and orange juice. When our hair was done, we went back to Cara and Jake's house to put on our dresses.
The ceremony was held outside at the beautiful Millennium Garden at the Plymouth Creek Center. The weather could not have been more perfect - perfect temperature, not too sunny. We arrived early for group pictures, then prepared the awesome centerpieces for the reception.
The ceremony was beautiful, Cara looked gorgeous in her dress, and everything went smoothly. Jenn crutched her way down the aisle and I didn't have to worry about heels because the bridesmaids (and bride) were barefoot! Like I said, perfect.
The reception was equally as amazing. The food was great, the cake was adorable, the music was awesome, and I danced like a maniac because I didn't know anyone there. All of Jake's friends were incredibly nice, so we had a wonderful time dancing with them and wheeling Jenn around on the dancefloor.
The wedding party choreographed a dance on Thursday night, so in the middle of Cara and Jake's first dance, the music stopped and a mix of songs came on for us to do our dance. It was too much fun. Hopefully, I can find a video and post it here later. Here was the finale:
Needless to say, the weekend was perfect. It was great to see Jake, meet his awesome friends and family, spend time with Laura and Kim, and be a part of such an incredible day.
The best part, however, was seeing Cara. After graduation, Cara moved to Minnesota to be with Jake and I've missed her terribly. While spending time with her this weekend, all of our amazing college memories came flooding back to me - the baby voices, our inside jokes, our nicknames, singing and "having a band." Despite the chaos and stress of the wedding, it felt like nothing had changed. It felt comfortable - like the basement of Central Perk.
I'm so unbelievably happy for Cara and Jake. It was a perfect night for a perfect couple and I cannot wait to visit them again.
Most of these pictures were taken by Cara's professional photographer, Jennifer Whalen
Thursday, we had the rehearsal and rehearsal dinner at a restaurant called Jake's (too cute). We spent the rest of the night, catching up with each other and getting to know the rest of the wedding party.
Friday, we (Jenn, Kim, Laura, and I) threw Cara a surprise bachelorette party. We decorated a park shelter with balloons and streamers, picked up Subway for lunch, and decorated matching t-shirts. It was so nice to spend time outside, relaxing before the wedding chaos began.
At the end, we wrote messages on the balloons and, despite my child-like whining, let them go.
Saturday, we got to the salon early to have our hair done. We brought breakfast with us and had bagels, fruit, muffins, and orange juice. When our hair was done, we went back to Cara and Jake's house to put on our dresses.
The ceremony was held outside at the beautiful Millennium Garden at the Plymouth Creek Center. The weather could not have been more perfect - perfect temperature, not too sunny. We arrived early for group pictures, then prepared the awesome centerpieces for the reception.
The ceremony was beautiful, Cara looked gorgeous in her dress, and everything went smoothly. Jenn crutched her way down the aisle and I didn't have to worry about heels because the bridesmaids (and bride) were barefoot! Like I said, perfect.
The reception was equally as amazing. The food was great, the cake was adorable, the music was awesome, and I danced like a maniac because I didn't know anyone there. All of Jake's friends were incredibly nice, so we had a wonderful time dancing with them and wheeling Jenn around on the dancefloor.
The wedding party choreographed a dance on Thursday night, so in the middle of Cara and Jake's first dance, the music stopped and a mix of songs came on for us to do our dance. It was too much fun. Hopefully, I can find a video and post it here later. Here was the finale:
Needless to say, the weekend was perfect. It was great to see Jake, meet his awesome friends and family, spend time with Laura and Kim, and be a part of such an incredible day.
The best part, however, was seeing Cara. After graduation, Cara moved to Minnesota to be with Jake and I've missed her terribly. While spending time with her this weekend, all of our amazing college memories came flooding back to me - the baby voices, our inside jokes, our nicknames, singing and "having a band." Despite the chaos and stress of the wedding, it felt like nothing had changed. It felt comfortable - like the basement of Central Perk.
I'm so unbelievably happy for Cara and Jake. It was a perfect night for a perfect couple and I cannot wait to visit them again.
Most of these pictures were taken by Cara's professional photographer, Jennifer Whalen
Wednesday, August 24, 2011
MOVIE TIME!
As soon as I get some pictures, I will do a post on Cara and Jake's wonderful wedding. Until then, you'll have to deal with some more pop culture.
The most wonderful time of the year for Southwestern Ohio is the fall. No question. The weather finally becomes bearable, hoodies become an acceptable piece of your ensemble, and football games completely monopolize the television screen. However, another perk of the changing of the seasons comes in the cinematic world.
For the most part, movie production studios follow this release pattern:
January to May - Movies with very low expectations; Movies the studio regrets paying to make (ex. Paul Blart: Mall Cop, Red Riding Hood, typically anything starring Nicolas Cage)
May to September - Summer Blockbusters (ex. Big sequels, Action/Adventures, Comedies, Superhero movies)
September to December - Oscar-worthy movies (ex. Most biopics, film festival favorites, etc.)
So, along with the coming of cooler weather comes an enjoyable trip to the movie theater. In my old blog, I reviewed movies almost every week. I can't promise to do that with any regularity, but I will make a better effort to continue that tradition here.
Here are five movies coming this fall that I cannot wait to see:
Red State (September 23) - Kevin Smith strays from his comedic roots in this film about a group of teenagers who answer an online sex ad only to find that the ad was posted by a group of Christian fundamentalist, right-wing extremists intent on punishing them for their sins. I am interested to see if Kevin Smith, who was inspired initially by the appalling Westboro Baptist Church, can pull off a horror film with such controversial political and religious undertones.
The Ides of March (October 7) - I cannot explain my excitement for this movie. Not only was it shot on my alma mater's campus and in downtown Cincinnati, but some of my friends were used as extras! When idealistic campaign staffer Stephen Myers (Ryan Gosling) learns a detrimental secret about presidential candidate Mike Morris (George Clooney), he must decide if electoral success is worth such a high moral cost. I love political thrillers, George Clooney is directing, this looks to be an absolute Oscar magnet, and two words: MAX MINGHELLA. Yum.
J. Edgar (November 11) - Clint Eastwood extends his directorial resume with a biopic about J. Edgar Hoover, a controversial American figure and the first director of the FBI. The movie is sure to depict the interesting professional and personal life of Hoover (Leonardo DiCaprio), including his secret love affair with Clyde Tolson (Armie Hammer). I'm a sucker for biopics and this one is written by Dustin Lance Black (writer of Milk), so its approach to his secret homosexuality will certainly be compelling. Plus, the mere thought of Leo kissing Armie Hammer (the sexy Winklevoss twins in The Social Network) has me shelling out $10 for my ticket and another $6 for the popcorn right now.
The Muppets (November 23) - Pretty self-explanatory. I'm a big kid, I love the Muppets, and Jason Segel is the father of my unborn child. You do the math.
Extremely Loud and Incredibly Close (December 25/wide release in January) - A nine-year-old searches New York City for the lock that matches the key left behind by his father, a victim of the 9/11 terrorist attacks. Released ten years after 9/11, this movie will probably pack a powerful, emotional punch, bolstered by a strong cast that includes Tom Hanks and Sandra Bullock.
Which movies will you be seeing on opening night this fall?
...and yeah, I'll probably see Breaking Dawn: Part 1 at midnight. Judge me all you want, but you can't keep me from Taylor Lautner.
The most wonderful time of the year for Southwestern Ohio is the fall. No question. The weather finally becomes bearable, hoodies become an acceptable piece of your ensemble, and football games completely monopolize the television screen. However, another perk of the changing of the seasons comes in the cinematic world.
For the most part, movie production studios follow this release pattern:
January to May - Movies with very low expectations; Movies the studio regrets paying to make (ex. Paul Blart: Mall Cop, Red Riding Hood, typically anything starring Nicolas Cage)
May to September - Summer Blockbusters (ex. Big sequels, Action/Adventures, Comedies, Superhero movies)
September to December - Oscar-worthy movies (ex. Most biopics, film festival favorites, etc.)
So, along with the coming of cooler weather comes an enjoyable trip to the movie theater. In my old blog, I reviewed movies almost every week. I can't promise to do that with any regularity, but I will make a better effort to continue that tradition here.
Here are five movies coming this fall that I cannot wait to see:
Red State (September 23) - Kevin Smith strays from his comedic roots in this film about a group of teenagers who answer an online sex ad only to find that the ad was posted by a group of Christian fundamentalist, right-wing extremists intent on punishing them for their sins. I am interested to see if Kevin Smith, who was inspired initially by the appalling Westboro Baptist Church, can pull off a horror film with such controversial political and religious undertones.
The Ides of March (October 7) - I cannot explain my excitement for this movie. Not only was it shot on my alma mater's campus and in downtown Cincinnati, but some of my friends were used as extras! When idealistic campaign staffer Stephen Myers (Ryan Gosling) learns a detrimental secret about presidential candidate Mike Morris (George Clooney), he must decide if electoral success is worth such a high moral cost. I love political thrillers, George Clooney is directing, this looks to be an absolute Oscar magnet, and two words: MAX MINGHELLA. Yum.
J. Edgar (November 11) - Clint Eastwood extends his directorial resume with a biopic about J. Edgar Hoover, a controversial American figure and the first director of the FBI. The movie is sure to depict the interesting professional and personal life of Hoover (Leonardo DiCaprio), including his secret love affair with Clyde Tolson (Armie Hammer). I'm a sucker for biopics and this one is written by Dustin Lance Black (writer of Milk), so its approach to his secret homosexuality will certainly be compelling. Plus, the mere thought of Leo kissing Armie Hammer (the sexy Winklevoss twins in The Social Network) has me shelling out $10 for my ticket and another $6 for the popcorn right now.
The Muppets (November 23) - Pretty self-explanatory. I'm a big kid, I love the Muppets, and Jason Segel is the father of my unborn child. You do the math.
Extremely Loud and Incredibly Close (December 25/wide release in January) - A nine-year-old searches New York City for the lock that matches the key left behind by his father, a victim of the 9/11 terrorist attacks. Released ten years after 9/11, this movie will probably pack a powerful, emotional punch, bolstered by a strong cast that includes Tom Hanks and Sandra Bullock.
Which movies will you be seeing on opening night this fall?
...and yeah, I'll probably see Breaking Dawn: Part 1 at midnight. Judge me all you want, but you can't keep me from Taylor Lautner.
Wednesday, August 17, 2011
Staal Brother Update
Remember when I made it a life goal to marry a Staal brother?
Well, another one of them is off the market. Marc Staal (Ginger Staal) got married this weekend, leaving only two Staal brothers available to complete my bucket list.
On a positive note, tons of pictures from the weekend have been floating around the Internet.
What a hideous family...
No, don't worry about it. I didn't need my ovaries, anyway.
Perfect combination. Jordan Staal + Football.
Hockey season cannot come soon enough.
I'm leaving tonight for my college housemate's wedding in Minnesota. I can't wait to see her! I'll post pictures. Promise.
Well, another one of them is off the market. Marc Staal (Ginger Staal) got married this weekend, leaving only two Staal brothers available to complete my bucket list.
On a positive note, tons of pictures from the weekend have been floating around the Internet.
What a hideous family...
No, don't worry about it. I didn't need my ovaries, anyway.
Perfect combination. Jordan Staal + Football.
Hockey season cannot come soon enough.
I'm leaving tonight for my college housemate's wedding in Minnesota. I can't wait to see her! I'll post pictures. Promise.
Monday, August 15, 2011
Man Meat Monday #27
Since I'm actually a gleeky tween at heart, I went to the Glee 3D movie at midnight on Thursday. No, not alone, you creeps.
I've been going through serious Glee withdrawal, so I couldn't wait any longer. The movie was incredible. I literally could not stop smiling and singing along. I admit I have a crush on just about every guy involved with Glee. However, there was one in particular that I loved seeing in three dimensions. Any excuse to have him closer to my mouth...
This isn't giving me any ideas.
Claim to Fame: Actor (Glee)
Birthday: February 5, 1987
I'm not sure how to say this any other way: Darren Criss is flawless. Here's the proof:
- He is a musical prodigy. We've all heard his incredible voice. He's also a classically trained violinist, plays the piano, drums, and guitar, and writes his own songs.
- He speaks Italian. Let me repeat that. He speaks Italian.
- Have you seen his face?
- He loves Disney songs - possibly more than I do. He has a ton of youtube videos where he covers classics from Beauty and the Beast, Mulan, and The Little Mermaid. Check them out. Your heart will melt.
- Obviously, he's a great actor. He is a straight guy, comfortable enough in his own sexuality to play a more-than-convincing gay teenager.
- Speaking of Glee, he is an incredible role model for gay teenagers (and adults!) and a champion of gay rights. *swoon*
- Have you seen his face?
- In interviews, he seems so down-to-earth and humble.
- He loves Harry Potter. As a student at the University of Michigan, he co-founded a theater production company called Team StarKid. While there, he wrote the music for A Very Potter Musical and A Very Potter Sequel and starred as Harry Potter in the productions. These musicals are hilarious and so well made. If you love Harry Potter as much as I do, watch them on youtube.
- Have you seen his face?
Random Tidbit: Continuing the trend of following Harry Potter in his career, Darren is set to replace Daniel Radcliffe in the Broadway revival of How to Succeed in Business without Really Trying. Trip to NYC anyone?
Only downfall?: After an hour of thinking, it suddenly hit me. He graduated from the University of Michigan. As a huge Buckeye fan, this isn't necessarily a dealbreaker, but it does pose a potential problem in November. Sidenote: In one episode of Glee, Blaine talks about Ohio State football, thereby making Darren perfect.
...and that, my friends, is how a youtube video impregnates you.
So, readers: It's your turn. Do you find Darren supermegafoxyawesomehot?
...because even though I lack the proper anatomy, I may audition for the Warblers next year just to see him everyday. Plus, those blazers are to die for.
I've been going through serious Glee withdrawal, so I couldn't wait any longer. The movie was incredible. I literally could not stop smiling and singing along. I admit I have a crush on just about every guy involved with Glee. However, there was one in particular that I loved seeing in three dimensions. Any excuse to have him closer to my mouth...
Darren Criss
This isn't giving me any ideas.
Claim to Fame: Actor (Glee)
Birthday: February 5, 1987
I'm not sure how to say this any other way: Darren Criss is flawless. Here's the proof:
- He is a musical prodigy. We've all heard his incredible voice. He's also a classically trained violinist, plays the piano, drums, and guitar, and writes his own songs.
- He speaks Italian. Let me repeat that. He speaks Italian.
- Have you seen his face?
- He loves Disney songs - possibly more than I do. He has a ton of youtube videos where he covers classics from Beauty and the Beast, Mulan, and The Little Mermaid. Check them out. Your heart will melt.
- Obviously, he's a great actor. He is a straight guy, comfortable enough in his own sexuality to play a more-than-convincing gay teenager.
- Speaking of Glee, he is an incredible role model for gay teenagers (and adults!) and a champion of gay rights. *swoon*
- Have you seen his face?
- In interviews, he seems so down-to-earth and humble.
- He loves Harry Potter. As a student at the University of Michigan, he co-founded a theater production company called Team StarKid. While there, he wrote the music for A Very Potter Musical and A Very Potter Sequel and starred as Harry Potter in the productions. These musicals are hilarious and so well made. If you love Harry Potter as much as I do, watch them on youtube.
- Have you seen his face?
Random Tidbit: Continuing the trend of following Harry Potter in his career, Darren is set to replace Daniel Radcliffe in the Broadway revival of How to Succeed in Business without Really Trying. Trip to NYC anyone?
Only downfall?: After an hour of thinking, it suddenly hit me. He graduated from the University of Michigan. As a huge Buckeye fan, this isn't necessarily a dealbreaker, but it does pose a potential problem in November. Sidenote: In one episode of Glee, Blaine talks about Ohio State football, thereby making Darren perfect.
...and that, my friends, is how a youtube video impregnates you.
So, readers: It's your turn. Do you find Darren supermegafoxyawesomehot?
...because even though I lack the proper anatomy, I may audition for the Warblers next year just to see him everyday. Plus, those blazers are to die for.
Thursday, August 11, 2011
Are YOU Ready?
We are quickly approaching the most wonderful time of the year.
After the lockout chaos and free agency frenzy, after the makeshift player-organized workouts and last-minute training camps, pre-season games have finally arrived for the NFL. Summer lifting and conditioning has transitioned into intense football camp for college teams. High school teams are preparing for their first games in a couple weeks. I have survived yet another offseason. It’s finally here.
It’s time for another glorious football season.
There is a common misperception (held by most people I know) that I love football because I love the players. I will not lie to you – I do love the players. I often entertain brief fantasies where I am a professional stay-at-home mom (and blogger, of course), married to an NFLer, driving our kids to football camp in a black Range Rover. I would marry Brian Urlacher with absolutely no hesitation. I swoon over Mark Sanchez, own a Chris Cooley jersey, and defend the attractive merits of AJ Hawk to naysayers. I have Chris Long desktop backgrounds, try to suppress my crushes on Ben Roethlisberger and Peyton Hillis, and I cannot even start with Tim Tebow.
So, in a way, you’re right. I do love the players. However, all of this pales in comparison to my love for the game itself.
I love football - everything about it. Over the last ten years, my football fanaticism has become a defining characteristic of my personality. Between the months of August and January, it dictates my weekend plans (and Monday…and Thursday…), occupies my every thought, and determines most of my wardrobe. It alienates me from loved ones who refuse to watch games with me, it gets me in trouble for yelling and cussing too much, and it sends my heart rate through the roof. Every fall, it becomes part of who I am and I wouldn’t have it any other way.
To claim that my love of football is based solely on the players is simply false – erroneous on all counts. My love of the game is nearly religious, something that evades accurate explanation.
It’s the linebacker who perfectly reads the offense and comes up with a huge tackle for a loss. It’s seeing the offensive line’s breath on a chilly afternoon as they position themselves on the line of scrimmage. It’s a quarterback’s audibles, somehow rising above the raucous cheering of the crowd. It’s going for it on 4th and inches. It’s the successful completion of an onside kick. It’s pre-game motivational speeches in the tunnel and the excitement and intensity of players before a big game. It’s handshakes at midfield before the coin toss. It’s the rewarding feeling of points scored by the defense – safety or interception. It’s the tell-tale Gatorade dumping at the end of a long, successful season. It’s “Start Me Up” by the Rolling Stones and it’s Guns N’ Roses’s “Welcome to the Jungle.”
It’s jumping into Mirror Lake, chirping Michigan fans, “Hang on Sloopy,” and dotting the I. It’s beautiful long passes being knocked down by perfect, close coverage by the secondary. It’s yelling “Who-Dey?!” with pride, even though you know the answer is everyone. It’s a military plane fly-by before kickoff. It’s the crunch of autumn leaves in the parking lot while walking to the front gate. It’s the sound of helmets clashing on the field. It’s clumps of turf stuck in a helmet and shoulder pads popping out. It’s the comforting feeling you get from pulling on an old jersey. It’s the smell of hot dogs cooking on the grill in the parking lot. It’s two-point conversions and hilarious touchdown celebrations. It’s screaming at refs for unrealistic ‘Roughing the Passer’ calls and horrible spots. It’s wearing a cheesehead and stomping on Terrible Towels. It’s holding hand-warmers in your pockets during December games and never once regretting the trip. It’s intense rivalries, group chants, and those Friday night lights. It’s primal screaming and veins bulging after a critical sack. It’s breaking a tackle for 30+ yards. It’s taking the field to the booming of fireworks. It’s student sections, personalized t-shirts, and hugs and tears after a tough loss.
It’s a game-changing interception returned for a touchdown by a player who needs an oxygen mask afterward. It’s changing your starters at the last minute for fantasy football. It’s holding hands with loved ones and closing your eyes because you can’t bear to watch the play. It’s that one miserable Sunday when your favorite team has a bye week. It’s Tom Hedden’s “A New Game” and the Monday Night Football theme song. It’s an announcer unable to contain his excitement and yelling his encouragement to a player. It’s post-game interviews and switching to SportsCenter for even more coverage. It’s breaking records, going undefeated, huge upset wins, and battling until the end. It’s local stores closing early to attend the game. It’s a quarterback and his receiver on the same page. It’s conversations at the store because of the jersey you’re wearing. It’s coaches and teammates consoling a player after a fumble or a dropped pass. It’s high-fiving strangers and singing post-touchdown songs. It’s tears of defeat, tears of victory, and feeling like a part of something bigger than yourself.
Ultimately, that’s why I love football. It connects you with others in a way few other things can. Over the course of the season, you debate, cry, hug, pray, celebrate, and spend countless hours with friends, family, and even complete strangers. You’re never alone – you’re together in defeat and you’re together in victory. Football is all about the collective – the brotherhood of the team and the dedication of the fans.
It’s football. It’s not about the players. It’s about the game.
After the lockout chaos and free agency frenzy, after the makeshift player-organized workouts and last-minute training camps, pre-season games have finally arrived for the NFL. Summer lifting and conditioning has transitioned into intense football camp for college teams. High school teams are preparing for their first games in a couple weeks. I have survived yet another offseason. It’s finally here.
It’s time for another glorious football season.
There is a common misperception (held by most people I know) that I love football because I love the players. I will not lie to you – I do love the players. I often entertain brief fantasies where I am a professional stay-at-home mom (and blogger, of course), married to an NFLer, driving our kids to football camp in a black Range Rover. I would marry Brian Urlacher with absolutely no hesitation. I swoon over Mark Sanchez, own a Chris Cooley jersey, and defend the attractive merits of AJ Hawk to naysayers. I have Chris Long desktop backgrounds, try to suppress my crushes on Ben Roethlisberger and Peyton Hillis, and I cannot even start with Tim Tebow.
So, in a way, you’re right. I do love the players. However, all of this pales in comparison to my love for the game itself.
I love football - everything about it. Over the last ten years, my football fanaticism has become a defining characteristic of my personality. Between the months of August and January, it dictates my weekend plans (and Monday…and Thursday…), occupies my every thought, and determines most of my wardrobe. It alienates me from loved ones who refuse to watch games with me, it gets me in trouble for yelling and cussing too much, and it sends my heart rate through the roof. Every fall, it becomes part of who I am and I wouldn’t have it any other way.
To claim that my love of football is based solely on the players is simply false – erroneous on all counts. My love of the game is nearly religious, something that evades accurate explanation.
It’s the linebacker who perfectly reads the offense and comes up with a huge tackle for a loss. It’s seeing the offensive line’s breath on a chilly afternoon as they position themselves on the line of scrimmage. It’s a quarterback’s audibles, somehow rising above the raucous cheering of the crowd. It’s going for it on 4th and inches. It’s the successful completion of an onside kick. It’s pre-game motivational speeches in the tunnel and the excitement and intensity of players before a big game. It’s handshakes at midfield before the coin toss. It’s the rewarding feeling of points scored by the defense – safety or interception. It’s the tell-tale Gatorade dumping at the end of a long, successful season. It’s “Start Me Up” by the Rolling Stones and it’s Guns N’ Roses’s “Welcome to the Jungle.”
It’s jumping into Mirror Lake, chirping Michigan fans, “Hang on Sloopy,” and dotting the I. It’s beautiful long passes being knocked down by perfect, close coverage by the secondary. It’s yelling “Who-Dey?!” with pride, even though you know the answer is everyone. It’s a military plane fly-by before kickoff. It’s the crunch of autumn leaves in the parking lot while walking to the front gate. It’s the sound of helmets clashing on the field. It’s clumps of turf stuck in a helmet and shoulder pads popping out. It’s the comforting feeling you get from pulling on an old jersey. It’s the smell of hot dogs cooking on the grill in the parking lot. It’s two-point conversions and hilarious touchdown celebrations. It’s screaming at refs for unrealistic ‘Roughing the Passer’ calls and horrible spots. It’s wearing a cheesehead and stomping on Terrible Towels. It’s holding hand-warmers in your pockets during December games and never once regretting the trip. It’s intense rivalries, group chants, and those Friday night lights. It’s primal screaming and veins bulging after a critical sack. It’s breaking a tackle for 30+ yards. It’s taking the field to the booming of fireworks. It’s student sections, personalized t-shirts, and hugs and tears after a tough loss.
It’s a game-changing interception returned for a touchdown by a player who needs an oxygen mask afterward. It’s changing your starters at the last minute for fantasy football. It’s holding hands with loved ones and closing your eyes because you can’t bear to watch the play. It’s that one miserable Sunday when your favorite team has a bye week. It’s Tom Hedden’s “A New Game” and the Monday Night Football theme song. It’s an announcer unable to contain his excitement and yelling his encouragement to a player. It’s post-game interviews and switching to SportsCenter for even more coverage. It’s breaking records, going undefeated, huge upset wins, and battling until the end. It’s local stores closing early to attend the game. It’s a quarterback and his receiver on the same page. It’s conversations at the store because of the jersey you’re wearing. It’s coaches and teammates consoling a player after a fumble or a dropped pass. It’s high-fiving strangers and singing post-touchdown songs. It’s tears of defeat, tears of victory, and feeling like a part of something bigger than yourself.
Ultimately, that’s why I love football. It connects you with others in a way few other things can. Over the course of the season, you debate, cry, hug, pray, celebrate, and spend countless hours with friends, family, and even complete strangers. You’re never alone – you’re together in defeat and you’re together in victory. Football is all about the collective – the brotherhood of the team and the dedication of the fans.
It’s football. It’s not about the players. It’s about the game.
Tuesday, August 9, 2011
A Nathan Adrian Hiatus.
Thursday, Nathan Adrian finished his season with a huge national championship win in the 50m freestyle.
Please notice 4:34-4:39. I am dead.
He decided to sit the 100m out in order to prepare for next year (in other words, London 2012). Much to my dismay, I won't have much to say about him until next summer.
So, fellow Nathan Adrian fans, I leave you with this to tide you over until the Olympics:
You are so welcome.
Please notice 4:34-4:39. I am dead.
He decided to sit the 100m out in order to prepare for next year (in other words, London 2012). Much to my dismay, I won't have much to say about him until next summer.
So, fellow Nathan Adrian fans, I leave you with this to tide you over until the Olympics:
You are so welcome.
Dave, Crash into Me. Please.
I used to be ashamed to admit that this is my favorite Dave Matthews Band song. Although I know all of their songs, I hated that the most cliche, the most popular one was my favorite. Now, I'm coming to terms with it. There is a reason it's their most popular song - it's amazing.
It sounds a little rough near the end, but I didn't feel like re-doing it.
It sounds a little rough near the end, but I didn't feel like re-doing it.
Monday, August 8, 2011
Man Meat Monday #26
It goes without saying that I can't wait for football to start. So, I've decided to honor the first of many football players for the upcoming season.
This week, I bring you the quarterback of my favorite NFC team and Nathan Adrian's fellow California Golden Bear...
There you go, Morgan. That's the closest Justin Timberlake will ever come to a Man Meat Monday post.
Claim to Fame: Quarterback for the Green Bay Packers
Birthday: December 2, 1983
In complete honesty, I liked the Packers before I liked the Bengals. My mom was raised in De Pere, Wisconsin, a tiny town of cheeseheads that live and breathe Packers' football. Her inbred love of the Packers followed her to Baltimore, then to Cincinnati. So, instead of growing up as a Bengals' fan, I watched Brett Favre work his magic throughout the '90s, including one glorious Super Bowl win in 1997.
I remember very well when Aaron Rodgers was drafted by the Pack in 2005. For three years, Rodgers sat back, bided his time, learned from Favre, and refined his game. Then, in 2008, Brett Favre, the lord and savior of the cheeseheads, announced his tearful "retirement." Not surprisingly, commentators and critics droned on and on about the big shoes Rodgers had to fill, their eternal love for Favre serving as a borderline condemnation for his protege.
After finishing his first season as a starter with a disappointing 6-10 record, Rodgers came back in a huge way in 2009, leading his team to the NFC wild card game and a 11-5 regular season record. 2010, however, was Aaron's time to shine. Finishing the season with a record of 10-6, the Packers ran over the Eagles, the Falcons, and the Bears before defeating the Steelers in Super Bowl XLV. Rodgers completed three touchdown passes in the win and was named the game's MVP, an honor that his all-hallowed predecessor never received.
Oh yeah - if Aaron's talent and leadership isn't sexy enough for you, he's also 6'2", well-spoken, and great with his fans.
Random Tidbit: He has his own record label, Suspended Sunrise Recordings.
Only downfall?: He doesn't wear the orange and black. On second thought, this is probably a good thing - my beloved Bengals aren't getting to the Super Bowl any time soon.
My favorite thing about Aaron, however, is his celebration. Whenever he makes a game-changing play (particularly rushing or passing for a touchdown), he pretends to put on an imaginary championship belt. During his post-Super Bowl speech, teammate Clay Matthews put an actual WWE Championship Belt around his shoulders.
So, readers: It's your turn. Is anyone wondering what else Rodgers is packing?
...because I guarantee he does the championship belt in bed.
This week, I bring you the quarterback of my favorite NFC team and Nathan Adrian's fellow California Golden Bear...
Aaron Rodgers
There you go, Morgan. That's the closest Justin Timberlake will ever come to a Man Meat Monday post.
Claim to Fame: Quarterback for the Green Bay Packers
Birthday: December 2, 1983
In complete honesty, I liked the Packers before I liked the Bengals. My mom was raised in De Pere, Wisconsin, a tiny town of cheeseheads that live and breathe Packers' football. Her inbred love of the Packers followed her to Baltimore, then to Cincinnati. So, instead of growing up as a Bengals' fan, I watched Brett Favre work his magic throughout the '90s, including one glorious Super Bowl win in 1997.
I remember very well when Aaron Rodgers was drafted by the Pack in 2005. For three years, Rodgers sat back, bided his time, learned from Favre, and refined his game. Then, in 2008, Brett Favre, the lord and savior of the cheeseheads, announced his tearful "retirement." Not surprisingly, commentators and critics droned on and on about the big shoes Rodgers had to fill, their eternal love for Favre serving as a borderline condemnation for his protege.
After finishing his first season as a starter with a disappointing 6-10 record, Rodgers came back in a huge way in 2009, leading his team to the NFC wild card game and a 11-5 regular season record. 2010, however, was Aaron's time to shine. Finishing the season with a record of 10-6, the Packers ran over the Eagles, the Falcons, and the Bears before defeating the Steelers in Super Bowl XLV. Rodgers completed three touchdown passes in the win and was named the game's MVP, an honor that his all-hallowed predecessor never received.
Oh yeah - if Aaron's talent and leadership isn't sexy enough for you, he's also 6'2", well-spoken, and great with his fans.
Random Tidbit: He has his own record label, Suspended Sunrise Recordings.
Only downfall?: He doesn't wear the orange and black. On second thought, this is probably a good thing - my beloved Bengals aren't getting to the Super Bowl any time soon.
My favorite thing about Aaron, however, is his celebration. Whenever he makes a game-changing play (particularly rushing or passing for a touchdown), he pretends to put on an imaginary championship belt. During his post-Super Bowl speech, teammate Clay Matthews put an actual WWE Championship Belt around his shoulders.
So, readers: It's your turn. Is anyone wondering what else Rodgers is packing?
...because I guarantee he does the championship belt in bed.
Friday, August 5, 2011
Top 5 Friday!
I've skipped a few, but it's time for Top 5 Friday!
With all of the recent football craziness, baseball season underway, and Swimming Worlds and Nationals, I have completely immersed myself in sports lately. So, I've decided to list my...
Top 5 Favorite Sports Movies
1. The Sandlot - No question. This was my favorite movie growing up and I have every line memorized. Even still, it has a wonderful way of taking me back to my childhood. Plus, I had a huge crush on Yeah-Yeah.
2. Friday Night Lights - The most realistic movie I've ever seen about high school football. The book was phenomenal - it does such a great job of capturing the devotion and nearly-religious following a good team can inspire in a town without much else.
3. Rudy - I know it's cliche. Sorry I'm not sorry. Everyone loves an underdog. Inspirational true story of hard work and dedication. Bonus perk? A young Vince Vaughn stars as Notre Dame's quarterback.
4. Remember the Titans - Can you tell I love football? Another amazing true story that proves that the bonds created on a team can withstand any adversity.
5. Happy Gilmore - Does this count? Either way, Adam Sandler at his best.
Runners-up: Miracle, The Mighty Ducks (and D2), A League of Their Own, Space Jam, Dodgeball
Confession: I've never seen Field of Dreams...or Hoosiers.
What's your favorite sports movie? I know I missed a ton.
With all of the recent football craziness, baseball season underway, and Swimming Worlds and Nationals, I have completely immersed myself in sports lately. So, I've decided to list my...
Top 5 Favorite Sports Movies
1. The Sandlot - No question. This was my favorite movie growing up and I have every line memorized. Even still, it has a wonderful way of taking me back to my childhood. Plus, I had a huge crush on Yeah-Yeah.
2. Friday Night Lights - The most realistic movie I've ever seen about high school football. The book was phenomenal - it does such a great job of capturing the devotion and nearly-religious following a good team can inspire in a town without much else.
3. Rudy - I know it's cliche. Sorry I'm not sorry. Everyone loves an underdog. Inspirational true story of hard work and dedication. Bonus perk? A young Vince Vaughn stars as Notre Dame's quarterback.
4. Remember the Titans - Can you tell I love football? Another amazing true story that proves that the bonds created on a team can withstand any adversity.
5. Happy Gilmore - Does this count? Either way, Adam Sandler at his best.
Runners-up: Miracle, The Mighty Ducks (and D2), A League of Their Own, Space Jam, Dodgeball
Confession: I've never seen Field of Dreams...or Hoosiers.
What's your favorite sports movie? I know I missed a ton.
Wednesday, August 3, 2011
When I was cool...
My mom found something a few days ago and I thought I'd share it with you.
Yep. A plate that I made on July 13, 1993 (which means I was five). Of course, it depicts the four Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles, me, my sister, and a very crudely drawn Splinter, the Japanese sewer rat.
This plate leaves me with a couple interesting observations and a few pressing questions:
1. Splinter doesn't look like a rat. He doesn't even look like an animal.
2. My sister doesn't have (and has never had) brown hair. Why did I draw her with a brown hair helmet?
3. Why was I considerably better at drawing human-like turtles than actual humans?
4. I'm pretty impressed that none of my letters are backwards. However, please note that my mom had to write the date. Couldn't handle numbers yet.
5. Michelangelo is placed prominently in the center because he was my favorite TMNT.
6. Why are Leonardo's arms coming out of his head?
Sadly, this is the coolest thing I have ever done. I peaked at age 5. Not proud.
Yep. A plate that I made on July 13, 1993 (which means I was five). Of course, it depicts the four Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles, me, my sister, and a very crudely drawn Splinter, the Japanese sewer rat.
This plate leaves me with a couple interesting observations and a few pressing questions:
1. Splinter doesn't look like a rat. He doesn't even look like an animal.
2. My sister doesn't have (and has never had) brown hair. Why did I draw her with a brown hair helmet?
3. Why was I considerably better at drawing human-like turtles than actual humans?
4. I'm pretty impressed that none of my letters are backwards. However, please note that my mom had to write the date. Couldn't handle numbers yet.
5. Michelangelo is placed prominently in the center because he was my favorite TMNT.
6. Why are Leonardo's arms coming out of his head?
Sadly, this is the coolest thing I have ever done. I peaked at age 5. Not proud.
Tuesday, August 2, 2011
Victory!
History has been made. I received my first ever Man Meat Monday response.
After gathering all my courage (and some encouragement from friends), I decided to tweet the link to Man Meat Monday #25 to none other than Nathan Adrian.
This morning, he responded.
I highly doubt that, Nathan.
Needless to say, I'm thrilled. Apparently, it does pay off to be a creep.
After gathering all my courage (and some encouragement from friends), I decided to tweet the link to Man Meat Monday #25 to none other than Nathan Adrian.
This morning, he responded.
I highly doubt that, Nathan.
Needless to say, I'm thrilled. Apparently, it does pay off to be a creep.
Monday, August 1, 2011
Man Meat Monday #25
Quick Sports Update: Nnamdi Asomugha went to the Eagles. Like I said, they take the Super Bowl. Also, I forgot to mention 16-year-old Missy Franklin as a stand-out for the 2012 Olympics. You've been warned.
Yesterday was Evgeni Malkin's 25th birthday, so I had to fight the urge to Man Meat my Geno. BUT, we are nowhere near hockey season and the FINA Swimming World Championships just finished. So, here is this week's deserving hunk of perfection...
Claim to Fame: Swimmer/Olympic gold medalist
Birthday: December 7, 1988
Let me explain. I love Michael Phelps (LOVE him), but he is retiring next year. I need a young buck to fulfill my swimmer fantasies when Phelpsy retires. Enter Nathan Adrian. I first saw him during the 2009 Worlds in Rome. Based solely on his appearance (come on - GORGEOUS, 6'6", 225 lbs), I googled him. What I found, however, gives me plenty of non-shallow reasons to obsess over him. I won't even begin with his impressive list of swimming accomplishments...or that he represents the US so wonderfully.
He is very close to graduating from the University of California - Berkeley as a pre-med, public health major. With a 3.75 GPA, he has been named (more than once) to the Academic All-America Team. There is only one thing more attractive to me than an enormous athlete...and that is a smart, enormous athlete. If you can spend five hours at the pool training for the Olympics, then come home to me and get into a hotly-contested debate on Nietzsche's influence on post-modern existentialism, I am yours. If you spend your day breaking state swimming records, then come home and challenge me in an episode of Jeopardy, then you aren't real. You are a figment of my imagination - a big, chiseled, handsome figment of my imagination.
Random Tidbit: Nathan Adrian is so adorably nerdy that he even made a guest appearance on an episode of MythBusters.
Only downfall?: He hasn't proposed yet.
Here is the clip from MythBusters. They wanted to see if you could swim as fast in syrup as you can in water. Spoiler Alert: You can.
So, readers: It's your turn. Would you like to use Nathan Adrian in some other food-related experiments?
Myth: Does Nathan Adrian taste better covered in honey? Plausible.
As a dedicated academic and a lover of the sciences, I am willing to put in hours of research.
Yesterday was Evgeni Malkin's 25th birthday, so I had to fight the urge to Man Meat my Geno. BUT, we are nowhere near hockey season and the FINA Swimming World Championships just finished. So, here is this week's deserving hunk of perfection...
Nathan Adrian
Claim to Fame: Swimmer/Olympic gold medalist
Birthday: December 7, 1988
Let me explain. I love Michael Phelps (LOVE him), but he is retiring next year. I need a young buck to fulfill my swimmer fantasies when Phelpsy retires. Enter Nathan Adrian. I first saw him during the 2009 Worlds in Rome. Based solely on his appearance (come on - GORGEOUS, 6'6", 225 lbs), I googled him. What I found, however, gives me plenty of non-shallow reasons to obsess over him. I won't even begin with his impressive list of swimming accomplishments...or that he represents the US so wonderfully.
He is very close to graduating from the University of California - Berkeley as a pre-med, public health major. With a 3.75 GPA, he has been named (more than once) to the Academic All-America Team. There is only one thing more attractive to me than an enormous athlete...and that is a smart, enormous athlete. If you can spend five hours at the pool training for the Olympics, then come home to me and get into a hotly-contested debate on Nietzsche's influence on post-modern existentialism, I am yours. If you spend your day breaking state swimming records, then come home and challenge me in an episode of Jeopardy, then you aren't real. You are a figment of my imagination - a big, chiseled, handsome figment of my imagination.
Random Tidbit: Nathan Adrian is so adorably nerdy that he even made a guest appearance on an episode of MythBusters.
Only downfall?: He hasn't proposed yet.
Here is the clip from MythBusters. They wanted to see if you could swim as fast in syrup as you can in water. Spoiler Alert: You can.
So, readers: It's your turn. Would you like to use Nathan Adrian in some other food-related experiments?
Myth: Does Nathan Adrian taste better covered in honey? Plausible.
As a dedicated academic and a lover of the sciences, I am willing to put in hours of research.
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