Top 2 Tuesday.

Woohoo! Top 2 Tuesday at The Undomestic Momma.

This week's topic is Top 2 Favorite U.S. Cities.

This is incredibly hard for me. I have been lucky enough to see a lot of the U.S. and I have a very tough time choosing my two favorites. So, I will cheat. I am going to choose my top 2 places to visit and my top 2 places to be.

1. New York City

I know it's cliche, but I absolutely love New York City. My dad is from Long Island, so I've had the opportunity to go a number of times. There is never a shortage of places to go and things to see. The Empire State Building, Broadway, Times Square, Madison Square Garden, Central Park, the list goes on and on. I don't think I could ever live there, but I would jump at every chance to go. Oh yeah - and contrary to popular belief, every New Yorker I've ever met has been incredibly kind!

2. Chicago

Clearly, I'm a city girl. To me, Chicago is the quintessential American city. It is so full of history, beautiful parks and architecture, and cool things to see. The skyline is gorgeous and honestly, so are the guys. There is nothing better than a corn-fed Midwestern boy. ;) Chicago is also home to Brian Urlacher (who was on this week's episode of Entourage! AHH!)...but, I promise - that didn't weigh too heavily on my decision.

For the record, I also love Las Vegas, St. Louis, New Orleans, and Memphis. I'm sure I would also love San Francisco and Boston, but I've never been to either one!

...and now for places I love to be...

1. Oxford, Ohio

How can I not choose it? I called it home for four wonderful years. Some of my fondest memories are set here and I can't wait to return Uptown to make some more.

2. Charlottesville, Virginia

I'm lucky enough to have a place in Charlottesville, too. Over the years, I have come to love it. I feel very comfortable there and love the bohemian, artistic lifestyle. I also enjoy its slower way of life and the beauty of the Blue Ridge Mountains. Whether it's tailgating before a UVA football game or spending the evening downtown at Miller's, I love spending time in C'Ville.

Gotta love those fear-mongers.

Maybe it's the political science major in me, but I feel compelled to talk about the "Ground Zero Mosque" issue...just like everyone else.

If you don't know what's going on, here it is in a nutshell: There is a proposal to build an Islamic center and mosque on private property located three blocks from Ground Zero. This center would include a performing arts center, a swimming pool, a lecture hall, a culinary school and restaurant, a gym, and a mosque.

I'm left wondering - what's the issue here?

Trust me. I understand the gravity of 9/11. I wasn't too young to realize the aftermath of the terrorist attacks. I was lucky enough to know no one harmed during the attack. This, of couse, doesn't mean that I wasn't deeply affected by it. So many people were lost and even more people were left to deal with the pain of losing them. I know that Muslim extremists were responsible for this atrocious act. I, like every other American, wanted them to pay. I know that Ground Zero is sacred ground: a spot to remember those lost and reflect on the tragic events of that day. Consequently, I know that people can become quite emotional when discussing 9/11 or Ground Zero.

That being said, this has nothing to do with any of that.

As we approach the nine-year anniversary of 9/11, I thought Americans would be more in tune with the difference between practicing Muslims and radical Muslim extremists. Apparently not.

First of all, why is this even being called the 'Ground Zero mosque?' It's not on Ground Zero. It is being built three blocks away from where the Twin Towers fell. Also, it is an Islamic center that includes a mosque - so, why are we simplifying the name to 'mosque?' We don't call the YMCA the LaRosa's basketball court. Why? Because it's not in LaRosa's and it's more than just a basketball court.

Also, there should be no question as to whether or not they can build this center. It is on private property. Those with the money to build it should be allowed to do so, assuming they abide by local construction laws.

America was founded on the principle of religious freedom. In fact, we learn in elementary school that the first European settlers came to America in an effort to avoid religious persecution. Years later, the founding fathers guaranteed religious freedom in the First Amendment to the Constitution:

"Congress shall make no law respecting an establishment of religion, or prohibiting the free exercise thereof..."

For hundreds of years, religious freedom has stood at the core of American beliefs and values. What better way to stay true to ourselves and affirm our strength and resilience to the rest of the world than show how tolerant we are? Why are we making an exception to our rule?

ISLAM IS A RELIGION. IT IS NOT A TERRORIST IDEOLOGY. There are Christian terrorists. There are Jewish terrorists. Terrorism is not exclusive to Muslims. This should go without saying. Unfortunately, we often have ignorant opinions force-fed to us and I think that many people forget this.

Building a mosque near Ground Zero isn't offensive or insensitive. It isn't being done maliciously as a slap in the face of the victims of 9/11. It won't look like a symbol of the terrorists' victory. It will serve as a symbol of our tolerance and our ability to forge ahead. It will demonstrate that we have preserved the ideas of our founding fathers and stand true to them today. It will show that we aren't bigots and that Muslims in our country are treated with the same respect as Christians, Jews, Buddhists, Mormons, and atheists.

There's another reason why this center should be built. Imagine being a Muslim American citizen on September 12, 2001. I really can't fathom the amount of ridicule, distrust, and scathing comments they have unjustly received. Can you imagine being on a plane? Unfortunately, our country is filled with too many closed-minded racists who can't move past the image of a turban or a burka. This center will serve as a community center for American citizens, not terrorists. We don't judge every pro-life advocate based on the actions of the few who walk into abortion clinics strapped with TNT. These American citizens have been criticized and mistreated for years, thanks to the horrendous actions of just a few extremists and our resulting Islamaphobia.

I understand how hard it is to get straight facts in this country. If you grow up with racist parents, chances are you will be racist. If you watch certain television programs, you will hear racist commentary. Contrary to popular belief, just because you see the word 'NEWS' in the corner of your television screen doesn't mean you are hearing unbiased facts.

As I've already mentioned, I have liberal leanings. I cannot stand Fox News. I would rather go to the dentist than listen to the garbage that spews from the mouths of Bill O'Reilly, Glenn Beck, or Sarah Palin. Unfortunately, so many people in this country listen to their programs with the mistaken belief that what they are hearing is unbiased news. It isn't. It is commentary...on a news channel. Biased commentary (that happens to be on the opposite side of the political spectrum than me). If their opinions align with yours, then that's fine. Listen to them. I can respect their opinions, but not when they are racist or use unfair generalizations. That is where I draw the line.

For instance, Glenn Beck recently said, "Muslims can do anything they want, just like every other American, except blow people up." Why is he insinuating that Muslims would want to blow people up? Comments like these create mistaken ideas. He isn't directly saying it, but that comment comes across to me as something close to 'Every Muslim is a terrorist."

Critics of the mosque are right about one thing. Building the center near Ground Zero won't improve Americans' perception of Muslims. Those who see Muslims with tunnel vision and lump them together with terrorists won't suddenly change their minds. Fox News commentators will continue to re-inforce the baseless, racist opinions of many Americans who don't realize the impact of their hate-filled words. Only people themselves can change their own personal perception of Muslims.

BUT, do you know what the center's construction will do? It will reassure me that the United States is truly the greatest and the strongest country in the world. It will show me that despite the fear-mongering, the racism, and the ignorance of a few, our country prevails on the tolerance and the fairness of the majority. It will prove yet again that we stand by the ideals of our founding fathers and that one horrifying act by a terrorist group hasn't altered the foundation of our wonderful country. It will make me even prouder than I already am to live in this country - a country in which a random 22-year-old girl can openly share her opinions on important issues like this.

62nd Annual Emmy Awards.

As promised, I'm here to fill you in on some football and the 62nd Annual Emmys.

The Bengals lost to the Buffalo Bills on Friday, 35-20. Yikes. Good thing the pre-season doesn't shake me. Our biggest problem seemed to be penalties, which we absolutely cannot afford. We had an embarassing amount of them (12 which totaled 122 yards). The saving grace? Our first-string offense looked better than it has in the last few games. Carson played pretty well, creating two touchdown drives in his three series. He connected with Ocho, T.O., and Gresham - who is looking better and better with each game. I'm not too upset with the loss, but we certainly need to get some things worked out before our opener against the Patriots.

In other football news, Urlacher missed his pre-season game against the Cardinals (a 14-9 loss) due to his 'strained left calf.' Luckily, they say he will be ready to go by the regular season. Tebow returned from his bruised ribs to play against the Steelers tonight. The Broncos won, 34-17. In addition to looking beautiful, Tebow went 5/10 for 72 yards. Not great, but not horrible. Although he threw his first NFL interception, he also threw his first NFL touchdown. I wonder when people will shut the hell up about his 'hideous release' and see that he is a capable passer? I know I'm biased, but sweet heavens...

And now, my thoughts on the Emmys:

• As usual, my predictions were absolutely horrendous. I correctly guessed 7 winners out of 26 total categories. I simply don't watch enough TV to know who will win. Maybe that's a good thing?

• I actually screamed in joy when Jane Lynch won Best Supporting Actress in a Comedy Series for Glee. She is the best part of the show and deserves it.

• Since I'm a huge gleek, I felt like my favorite show got the shaft. Lea Michele, Chris Colfer, and Matthew Morrison were up for awards (and lost). Even more painful, Glee didn't win Best Comedy Series. It's alright - hopefully next season is even better!

• How is Lea Michele so beautiful? I absolutely loved her Oscar de la Renta dress - my favorite one of the night. She also pulls off bangs better than I do...and I've been rockin' these bad boys since the 5th grade. ;)



• Tina Fey is just amazing. So is George Clooney, who won the Bob Hope Humanitarian Award. Apparently, he isn't just handsome, talented, and smart. He's also self-sacrificing, generous, and charitable. Some people have it all, I suppose.

• Why wasn't Entourage up for anything?

• Don't get me wrong - I love Betty White. Still, is anyone else getting tired of the granny with a healthy sexual appetite bit yet? Maybe I'm just jealous that she's scoring with Hollywood's hottest men...and I'm sitting at home, drooling.

• Looks like I need to watch Modern Family, Mad Men, and Temple Grandin.

• Jimmy Fallon did pretty well as the host. While watching his late night show, I normally feel uncomfortable and nervous for him. That's probably not a good sign. Tonight, though, he seemed a whole lot less awkward than some of the presenters. His parody songs were a great touch and reminded me of his best days on SNL.

• I really, really don't like Anna Paquin. Something about her face, voice, and general demeanor annoy me. A lot. Maybe that's why, despite my best efforts, I cannot get into True Blood.

• Am I the only person that finds Ricky Gervais extremely attractive? Please say no. I don't think it's the looks. He's just ridiculously hilarious to me.

Honey Nut Cheerios complete me.

It's that time again. Getting to know YOU Sundays at MannLand5.

1. If you accidently knick a car in a parking lot..Do you leave a note or do you get the heck out of there?

Well, I've never done this, but I'm fairly certain I would leave a note. The guilty conscience would kill me if I left.

2. Love your body or plastic surgery?

Let's be clear. I don't love my body, but I don't think I'd get plastic surgery either.

3. What about your favorite blog(s) continues to drive you back?

Humor. I also love reading rants, critiques, and any kind of celebrity post.

4. What percent of your blog is BS just to make your life seem more interesting than it really is?

Absolutely 0%. Can't you tell?

5. If you had to give up one type of meat for the rest of your life, what would it be?

Fish. I hate the taste of most fish.

6. How often do you eat out?

It used to be a whole lot more at school, but these days, about once (maybe twice) a week.

7. Skinny jeans or boot cut jeans?

Neither. I own zero pairs of jeans.

8. If you caught your spouse cheating would you forgive, divorce, or plan your kill?

Hmm...easier said than done. I've never been in that situation and hopefully never will. If so, I'm not sure. It depends on the circumstances. For example, whether you have kids or not, etc.

I'll be back later with a Bengals and Emmys update.

I love movies.

I've decided that today is the day. I will attempt to count down my top 10 favorite movies of all-time (in no particular order).

1. The Departed

I can honestly say that this is my favorite movie of all-time. Martin Scorsese is a genius, the cast is stacked, and the story is brilliant. The acting is incredible and I love every single person in it. Matt Damon, Leonardo DiCaprio, Jack Nicholson, Mark Wahlberg, Alec Baldwin, Martin Sheen. I also love gangster/mafia movies and this is the quintessential modern mob movie. It's drama, comedy, and action all in one. Plus, I love the whole Irish-Boston feel to it. It makes me want to go there. Badly.

2. American Beauty

If I could have written any screenplay, I would have wanted it to be this. Somehow, the story is both hilarious and haunting. Although I was only 12 when I first saw it, I was forever changed by it. Kevin Spacey and Annette Bening are phenomenal. In many ways, it is a parody of stereotypical suburban life. The music is perfect for it, too.

3. Forrest Gump

I think everyone loves this movie. It is responsible for Tom Hanks becoming my favorite actor. I love how it intricately weaves throughout the decades, touching on so many important events throughout American history. Elvis, Bear Bryant and Alabama football, desegregation of schools, Vietnam, John Lennon, Watergate, etc. It's so simple, yet so complex.

4. Fight Club

Do I even have to rationalize this? I love Chuck Palahniuk. Although Fight Club isn't my favorite Chuck book, it is one of my favorite movies. Edward Norton and Brad Pitt portray the character(s) perfectly and Helena Bonham Carter is creepy as always. The movie leaves me with this empty feeling (that isn't necessarily a good one), but I love movies that have that power over me. I could go on forever about this movie, but I almost forgot...The first rule of Fight Club is: You do not talk about Fight Club. That may actually be the second rule, too.

5. Moulin Rouge

Ever since I was a child, I have loved musicals. In fact, I can't think of a single musical I don't like. I could easily fill a top 10 musical list. Still, I have to be selective, so I will choose Moulin Rouge to represent all of my musical loves. It does pain me not to include A Chorus Line. The music in this movie is amazing. Ewan McGregor and Nicole Kidman are perfect together and I love the bizarre directing style of Baz Luhrman.

6. Boondock Saints

A high school favorite. Another Boston action flick. I don't know what it is with the Irish/Boston feel, but I love it. The movie has such an awesome concept and it's one of my absolute cult favorites. Not to brag, but I think I saw this movie about 3 years before it became insanely popular. Throughout high school, we probably watched it at my house every other weekend.

7. Swingers

Speaking of cult classics, Swingers is just a beautiful film. It is so simple and so true. Everyone can relate to this movie. Jon Favreau's writing is so spot-on. The whole script is based on his life and his real-life friendship with Vince Vaughn. Vince, of course, is flawless. You can see the early signs of his quick-talking, hilarious spitfire. This was the beginning of our life-long love affair.

8. Friday Night Lights

Commence cry fest. This movie perfectly embodies the intensity and passion of high school football. Although I'm not from Texas, I feel like Ohio is close in its obsession with football. It almost seems like a documentary to me...mostly because it's based on an incredible true story of Odessa, Texas. Plus, Explosions in the Sky is perfect football music.

9. 300

Aside from my intense crush on Gerard Butler, this movie is awesome. I'm a huge history buff and although the director took some creative liberties with the story, there are key parts that hold true to the real battle of Thermopylae. I'm endlessly interested in the Spartans and let's be honest - there are some badass one-liners. Finally, the cinematography is out of this world.

10. The Sandlot

Oh, come on. You knew this was coming. My childhood favorite. When asked what my favorite movie is, I always say The Sandlot in an effort to avoid controversy and get away without really answering the question. It's such a wonderful children's story with such a cute plot. Oh yeah - I also had a huge crush on Yeah Yeah.

...and there you have it.

...and this one belongs to the Reds!

Over the years, my relationship with baseball has been surprisingly solid.

Growing up, I was surrounded completely by UVA football and never really paid much attention to baseball. Despite the fact that he's from New York City, my dad was never really a baseball fan. Still, he would take us to Cinergy Field, and later Great American Ballpark, for games quite often. Consequently, I have some wonderful memories with him at games and have developed a soft-spot for the hometown team.

Although football is clearly my true sports love (and hockey has recently become my gigolo), I have always been a Reds fan and have never gone a summer without attending at least one of their games. ...and before you make fun of me, I looked it up - gigolo is the male version of a 'mistress.'

This summer, it has been particularly easy to be a Reds fan. They are on fire and this is unusual for the end of August. They are currently leading the NL Central with a four-game lead over St. Louis. Play-offs, here we come!

Tonight, I convinced my wonderful dad to take me to my 4th game of the season. Thanks to the promise of dinner, it didn't take too much arm-twisting. He scalped one ticket and got the other from a family friend. He made reservations for the Riverfront Club where we stayed until the 6th inning.

If you ever get the chance, I suggest you have dinner in the Riverfront Club. The view is unbeatable. You sit in the air conditioning, in front of an enormous window, eat, and watch the game. The view of the field and the Ohio River is beautiful. That is, of course, if there is such a thing as a beautiful view of that sketchy water.

He had salmon, soup, and salad. I took the more traditional baseball route and went with sliders and chips. The food was great and the view was better.

After we left dinner, we walked around the stadium for a bit before settling on some nosebleeds. The Reds man-handled the Cubs, beating them 7-1. Right Fielder Jay Bruce hit THREE homeruns and I got to stare at Votto. Always a plus.

After the game, we watched the awesome fireworks display. It was synchronized to music and the songs were great, too. They played some DMB, "Burning Down the House" by The Talking Heads, "Tom Sawyer" by Rush, and "Higher Ground" by The Red Hot Chili Peppers. Not bad.

Maybe some day I'll stop living this easy dream life and be a real person. Maybe. ;)

The Bengals play the Bills tomorrow. Who-dey?!

Stream of consciousness for the win!

Random assortment of thoughts:

• Today really felt like fall to me. It was finally cool enough to turn off our air conditioning and open all the windows and doors. I love that.


• I also made the surprising decision to bake today. I made 24 spice cake cupcakes with cream cheese frosting. If you know me at all, you realize that this is a big deal.




• While I was making the cupcakes, I watched a replay of the Florida game against South Carolina from last year on ESPNU. I felt so...southern...watching college football and baking with the windows open. HA! For one brief second, I even considered being a housewife. Don't worry - I quickly thought better of it. I mean, unless Tebow wanted me to stay home with the kids. Side note: If I actually married him, I think I would still call him Tebow. Is that a problem?


• Speaking of career choices, I really need to get a job. ASAP. Any suggestions, friends?


• I had to remind my parents that it was their 24th wedding anniversary today. Awesome.


• Jenn, Mrs. Koenig, and I went to the midnight showing of The Last Exorcism. I have mixed feelings on the movie. There were a few incredibly creepy parts (most of which were shown in the previews). However, the ending was...awful. I hate that about scary movies. There is always a gaping plot hole or a forced ending.
  

...and there you have it.

PS - I miss my sister.

Clearly, I'm auditioning for an after-school special.

It's getting heavy tonight:

There are few things in this life that bother me more than vices used as self-medication.

People often ask me why I don't drink. Before I was 21, many assumed I would start once I hit the magic drinking age. Although I am usually a law-abiding citizen, this certainly was not the reason I chose to avoid alcohol in high school and the first years of college. In fact, I always found it moronic that on November 30, 2008, I wasn't old enough to drink, but the very next day I could. I know everyone is different, but my maturity level plateaued in the 8th grade.

My reasons were (and still are) the following:

• I hate being vulnerable and not having complete control over my actions, words, ability to keep myself from drooling, etc.
• I don't need alcohol to open up, relax, or have fun.
• I cannot imagine forgetting something that happened the night before.
• I have seen plenty of drunk idiots...and even worse, I've seen smart people make stupid decisions while drunk.
• Along those same lines, I've seen what alcohol can do to relationships and how it affects a family.
• I don't ever want to sound stupid.
• I don't have the money to spend on alcohol.
• With the exception of a few girly drinks, I don't like the taste. Plus, I still prefer Dr. Pepper over the few I do like.
• I don't like the feeling 'a buzz' gives you...and I've never had more than that.
• I'm ridiculous enough as it is. I can't imagine a drunk me.

Although this isn't a reason necessarily, it is also a nice perk to know that I will always be straight enough to care for my friends and make sure they get home safely.

So, my 21st birthday came and went...and I stayed alcohol-free. Although I've had some things to drink, I've never smoked anything. Not a cigarette, cigar, pot, etc.

If you know me at all, this isn't for lack of company or availability. I am constantly surrounded by drinkers and cigarette and pot smokers. I have genuinely never had any interest in it. Ever.

Don't get me wrong. I'm not against any of it. I've seen my friends have some of the best nights of their lives while drinking, smoking, or both. I am strongly opposed to the government trying to tell me what I can and can't do. For this reason, I'm pro-choice, I'm an advocate of same-sex marriage, and I think marijuana should be legalized. (It helps, of course, that I have no religious complications with these issues either)

Still, I have made the choice (and will probably continue) to live my life alcohol- and drug-free.

That being said, I don't think alcohol, cigarettes, drugs, or food should be used as a crutch. They shouldn't be used as a form of self-medication.

It seems all too easy for me to say that. I'm not in the habit of using these things, nor am I dependent on them. I understand that addiction is a real thing and it's easier said than done to quit them. Still, it makes me incredibly sad when people I know and love turn to these things to deal with their problems.

I have watched friends and family drink away problems every night after work. I have watched them go outside for a smoke to relax. I have watched them attempt to numb themselves enough to forget reality...or, at the very least, lessen the pain of dealing with it. I've watched friends ignore problems until they are drunk enough to bring them up. In many of these cases, these coping mechanisms become such an integral part of their life and their daily routine that they start to define that person as a whole.

I know for a fact that a person is strong enough to deal with their problems without these things. I have plenty of issues, fears, obligations, etc. and I never cope by abusing these substances. I don't need to self-medicate every night in order to feel better about myself and my situation. There are healthier ways to deal with things.

I don't care how cheesy this sounds. It's true.

The only thing you need to appropriately deal with your issues (besides some courage) is love and support. It doesn't matter where you find this love. For many, it comes from their relationship with God and the strength that their faith provides them. For others, it comes from family and friends. In some cases, it comes from complete strangers - therapists, counselors on a suicide hotline, fellow addicts at an AA meeting. Everyone has someone who cares.

It took me awhile to learn this. I used to bottle up my emotions and wallow in my sadness. While in public, I would pretend everything was okay. This came back to haunt me once I was alone (or, unfortunately for her, with Jenn). I would physically hurt myself. I would break down, scream, pull my hair out, cry, and, occasionally, cut myself. Anything to release the pain. For awhile, it felt like it worked. I was horribly wrong.

Weeks later, I would still be dealing with the same problems, the same frustrations, the same insecurities, and a few new scars. That coping mechanism didn't help me cope at all - it just served as a breaking point after I bottled my emotions up for weeks at a time. Slowly, I came to learn that the only way to deal with my issues was to face them myself and talk to people...people who care about me.

I am luckier than most because my love and support comes from a multitude of places. For me, it comes from my wonderful parents who I know would love me no matter what. It also comes from Jamie and L.P. who would support any choice I make. It comes from Jenn, the best friend anyone could ever ask for, who sacrifices sleep, work outs, or relaxation time daily to listen and support me. It comes from a Facebook thread with Morgan and Sib. It comes from mass texts to Derailed. Since I'm better at writing than speaking, it comes from writing in this journal.

There are healthy ways to deal with unfair situations, stress, anger, and sadness. You don't have to turn yourself over to addiction. You don't need to depend on alcohol, drugs, or nicotine to relieve yourself. If you choose to use these substances for recreational purposes (even if that is every single day), that's your choice...and I completely respect that. It just pains me to see people turn to these things as a last resort or as a coping mechanism.

So, here I will make a vow. If you are reading this and need someone to listen, I am here. I can't promise ground-breaking advice, but I can promise attention, an open mind, and support. I may not be able to relate at all, but I am a good listener...and a pretty good hugger, too. Sometimes, that's all you need. I know because I've been there.

Told you. Shit got real.

Hallelujah.

In a previous blog post, I stated that I would upload a picture of Tim Tebow in boxer-briefs the instant I saw it. This, of course, was in reference to his signing as a spokesman for Jockey. Since then, I have come to terms with the fact that his image will probably only allow him to model t-shirts.

That being said, I saw a youtube video today where Timmy T. was wearing nothing but boxer-briefs. Now, I'm not one to break promises. True to form, I print-screened that bad boy to share with all of you. Lucky readers. ;)

Come on. I was obligated.

Grammar police SAY WHAT?!

I know how this post sounds - snobby, pretentious, and trivial. You're probably right.

However, it is my blog and I have some pet peeves to address. So, read on and perhaps be enlightened.

Some of you already know that I'm a stickler for grammar. I probably should be an editor. Today, I heard someone (who will remain nameless) say the following sentence: "I could of cared less." I have two issues with this.

1. The phrase itself. Saying that you could care less implies that you do care to an extent (or that there is a scenario in which you could care less about that issue). However, when people use this phrase, they are trying to express how little they care about something. Saying they could care less shows that they do care...and has the opposite effect.

The proper phrase? "I could not care less." This implies that you care so little about the issue that you can't be any more disinterested in it.

For example, "I could not care less about Brett Favre's diva-like behavior."

2. The use of 'of' rather than 'have.' You say that you could have done something, not could of. Could have, should have, would have. In this tense, those two words are inseparable. That's it. No exceptions. The only time you can put the words 'could' and 'of' next to each other is when they are part of different grammatical elements.

For example, 'Brittany tried to steal all she could of Tim Tebow's decency." In this sentence, I am doing everything I can to corrupt Tim Tebow and penetrate his moral fortress. The sentence could be complete after the word 'could,' but I use the word 'of' to show what I'm stealing. See the difference?

I understand why people confuse 'could have' and 'could of.' When you use the contraction 'could've,' it sounds an awful lot like 'could of.' BUT - it's not.

So, in sum, I'm a psycho...and I now realize that most of you could not have cared less about this entry. ;)