Sleepless nights.

It has taken me quite awhile, but I think I'm starting to realize something.

We are all searching. Every single one of us. We are searching for God, answers, love, jobs, acceptance, happiness, understanding. We are searching for things and we don't even know what they are. No one, absolutely no one, is perfect. We are all broken, fragile and imperfect, constantly searching for things we may never find.

I want a job. I want to fall hopelessly in love. I want complete happiness. I want to find God and I want to know why I'm here. I'm starting to come to the realization that some of these things may never happen. We search for love in the wrong places. We think we can find self-worth in temporary things. We invest so much of ourselves, expecting a tremendous pay-out that was never promised to us in the first place.

So, what's the point?

I think I've found it. It's not about the end result - the temporary gratification you find in a significant other or a well-paying job. Those things can be stripped from you in an instant by forces outside of your control. It's about what you make of it and how you get there.

We decide how we handle situations. We make our own decisions. We decide how we respond to others' decisions. If we remind ourselves that we, too, are broken and searching, we can tolerate anything. Understanding that everyone is in the same ultimate position can provide comfort and tolerance, caring and understanding, empathy and patience. Nothing is easy. We are just trying to find something, trying to make our way in the best way we can. If we can find peace in the knowledge that no one and nothing is perfect, then we can live freely.

Unrealistic expectations of those we love, of things outside of our control, and of ourselves cause so much pain. All we can do is our best and hope that others will do the same. No one is perfect and nothing ends perfectly. A book isn't filled with pages of the ending. It is filled with the journey that leads there.

When we realize that we can't control every outcome, we become much better at accepting the results. Accepting the ugliness of the world is the first step in noticing its beauty. Trying to understand someone else's struggles will help you realize that we are all the same and that we all need support. I am a firm believer in the awesome power of love, encouragement, understanding, and tolerance.

We are all searching...but no one has to do it alone.